Right By Your Side
by ninalasvegas
Summary: AU. Katniss Everdeen is getting threatened and Peeta Mellark is there to protect her. In the end they end up saving each other, but how long will it take for Katniss to see that? Will Peeta still be there for her when she comes back to him?
1. Chapter 1

Hi Everyone! This is my first ever fanfic, so go easy on me please. :] I hope you enjoy it!

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><p>We lock eyes from across the hallway. I turn in the other direction, heading straight for the door leading outside. Why does he always seem to be where I am? And why is he always staring right at me? I adjust my backpack, pulling one shoulder up to make it more comfortable. As I begin to push open the door, I feel a soft hand on my shoulder. I immediately stiffen as a result of my honed hunting instincts.<p>

"You dropped something," a tentative voice murmurs just behind me.

I turn around and Peeta Mellark is right in front of me kneeling down. His blonde hair is a little unkempt and his gentle blue eyes meet mine as he rises back up. He seems out of breath as if he had to rush to catch up with me. In his hand is a pencil; it must have fallen out of my bag when I had adjusted it. I take it and put it back in my bag. "Thanks."

"No problem. Thought you might need it." Is he blushing? Why is he blushing? "I'm Peeta Mellark."

"I know. We've been at the same school since we were little kids." We're both juniors in high school now. I'm sixteen and he's seventeen. Everyone knows Peeta Mellark. He's average height and has a stocky build due to his lifting heavy bags of flour at his parent's bakery. He's the guy that can walk into a room of strangers but always leaves with a new friend. He's a charmer. It could be real but it could also be a facade he puts on for public eyes. No one can be that nice. I look out the window. Prim is meeting me so we can walk home together and I don't really have time to stand here and talk to him. I see her walk up just as he begins another sentence.

"I wasn't sure. By any chance, did you hear what the homework was for Mrs. Neppencourt's English class?"

"We didn't have any. Sorry, but I need to go. I have some things I need to get to." I push open the doors and walk outside.

I run straight into a broad chest. I stumble and catch myself.

"Sorry, that was an-" I am cut off when the person's hands push me out of the way roughly and shoves open the doors.

I glance back and see Peeta still standing right inside, obviously witnessing my clumsiness. He smiles at me. A classmate of ours named Scott stops and glances back at me with an angry face. He walks up to Peeta and says something and laughs. Of course it was Scott I ran in to. Go figure. I've never liked Scott; he always runs around school bullying other kids. Peeta seems to share that opinion as he stares at him for a moment. He looks angry before he replies, shaking his head at Scott. He turns around and walks down the hallway in the opposite direction of him and leaves my sight.

"Katniss! Look what I found today!" Prim opens up a small cardboard box slightly and leans it in towards me. I see a small lizard inside, small and green and scaly. "Can I keep it?"

"I don't know, little duck, Mom might not be happy about that. We should probably just let it go somewhere on the way home." We both begin walking home.

Prim's lower lip jutted out in a pout. "But... yeah. I understand."

"I'm sorry. You know if it were my choice I would let you; besides, Buttercup would probably just try to eat it anyways."

"Yeah... I guess so. You're right." We keep walking towards the Seam. "Who was that boy you were talking to?" She smiles at me as she grabs my hand to hold.

"What boy? Peeta? He's just... Peeta. I don't really know him." Truthfully, I don't. I know who he is, and I've seen him around, but this afternoon was the first time we ever had a real conversation, if you can call that a conversation. I kick a rock and give her hand a squeeze, grinning. "Are you spying on me now? You silly goose."

Prim rolls her eyes and giggles. "Of course not. I just noticed him watching you as you were coming out to meet me. He seemed awfully... well... interested. What did he want?"

"Nothing, Prim. He was just returning something I dropped. Promise." We begin to get closer to a wooded area. "Let's let your little friend go up ahead here. It's the perfect spot." We come to a stop and Prim walks over to a tree. She squats down and holds the box next to a limb and opens the lid. Quickly, the lizard darts up and into the tree to where we can no longer see it.

"Bye, little Lizzie!" Prim waves her little fingers at it. She turns around to me, but her eyes go behind me. "Hey, there's that boy again."

I freeze. Slowly, I turn around. Peeta is walking up the road toward his parent's bakery. I sometimes stop by there to trade hunted game for bread. Their goods are too expensive for my family to afford, and I'm pretty sure his dad only trades with me because he feels sorry for us. It's obvious he hides our trading from his wife because he never does it if she's around. But they're all decently nice, I suppose. Except for his witch of a mother. She always has a scowl on her face.

As Peeta walks up the steps to the door, I can hear his mother yelling something at him. He pauses before he opens the door, takes a deep breath, and walks in.

Prim and I look at each other and keep walking towards our house. After a bit, we are kicking off our shoes inside our front door.

That night, I lie in my bed staring at the ceiling. I can't sleep as questions begin running through my head. What did Peeta want in the hallway earlier? What did Scott say to him to make him angry? Why was he so apprehensive as he walked into his house? Yes, his mother is terrible.. but surely it couldn't be that bad. These questions kept rolling through my mind as I slowly drift to sleep with the boy with the bread taking me away into my dreams.


	2. Chapter 2

_I'm young and hungry. My father has died from a coal mining explosion and my mother is in a deep depression. Most days she sits in a chair and stares out the window, unresponsive to the world around her. We are hungry and have not eaten in days. I have tried hunting but couldn't get anything. I'm digging through trash cans at the local bakery as Peeta's mother yells at me from the doorstep. All of a sudden I'm on the ground and it's raining. I have no energy left. This must be the end. _

_But then Peeta is outside. His mother is still yelling, and I see her hit him. She goes back inside and he quickly tosses burnt bread to me. He has a welt on his face as he runs back inside. My heart breaks for him, but no words come out._

_That bread saves my family's life. I never thanked Peeta, the boy with the bread. How do you thank someone for saving your life? I've never forgotten it, and I can never be thankful enough._

I'm sitting in English class when my friend Madge comes up to sit in front of me. She puts her books down and turns around in her seat. "I have the juiciest news ever!"

I chuckle. Madge and I have been friends for awhile now. It still never fails to surprise me when she has new gossip to talk about, which is basically all the time. It's nice having a friend I can just be a teenager with sometimes. Usually, at least. Sometimes she just drives me crazy.

"And what's that?" I pull my braid over my shoulder and shake it out. I run my fingers through my hair and start to rebraid it.

"I heard someone likes you." She winks and does a little dance in her seat. She stares at me with wide eyes. I start laughing.

"That's ridiculous, Madge. And so is the face you're making. Stop it!" I look over at Peeta and see him gazing in our direction. As soon as my eyes make contact with his, he shifts and watches the front of the room. His arm reaches up to scratch the back of his neck. I turn back to face Madge and she's grinning at me incessantly.

"So you've noticed?" She nods in Peeta's direction. "He's always looking at you! Everytime I see you, he's always around and glancing in your direction. Ever since we were little kids. I don't know why I never noticed it before."

"Like I said Madge, it's ridiculous. We've only ever talked once. You're just imagining things." The teacher walks into our classroom. "Now pay attention. You didn't do well on your last test." She pouts and turns around in her seat. I smile to myself. She's so silly.

There's no way Peeta likes me. We've never talked. We've never seen each other outside of school, not counting the times I've traded game I've hunted at the bakery. I roll my eyes. I don't know why I'm even thinking about this. I barely know the guy. I look out the window as I wait for class to let out so I can go home. I sneak one last glance at Peeta out of the corner of my eye, and make eye contact with him again.

Hmmm... Maybe Madge isn't imagining things.

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><p>I'm on my way home from school when I hear someone calling my name. I turn around and see Peeta a few feet behind me. My eyes widen and I look around. Was it him calling me? Was I imagining things?<p>

He comes to a stop once he's next to me. "Hi." He smiles shyly as he nods in the direction I was walking. We both keep pace with each other as we walk together. I give a small nod and look ahead.

"Have you started your English paper yet? It's killing me," he says as he puts his hands in his pockets. He glances at me. "This assignment isn't hard, it's just tedious. All the research we have to put into it and all."

I give a small smile. "You still have a week. I only have a page left and I'm done."

"Where's the little girl you usually walk home with? With the pigtails?"

"Oh, my sister? Her name is Prim. She's been sick so my mom kept her out of school." I look at him. How did he know I usually walk home with Prim? I shrug. "Today it's just me."

"And me," he smiles. "I saw you walking alone and figured you could use some company."

"I was fine, but it's a nice gesture. Thanks." I bite my lip. I just don't know what to say to this guy. I can tell I'm coming off a little short, but I literally have no idea how to talk to him. We have nothing in common apart from the fact that we go to the same school.

"So you're close to your sister?"

"Yeah. I love her to death."

"She loves you too. You can tell when you two are together. I wish my brothers and I had a relationship like that. We can barely stand to work together at the bakery most days, let alone walk home from school together everyday."

"You have brothers?" I look at him. I never noticed that. I knew there were a few other boys that worked at the bakery, but for some reason it never registered to me that they were his family as well.

"Yeah. Two. Both older. But we basically only tolerate each other. Not like you and Prim."

I smile. "Me and Prim are pretty lucky, I guess. She does drive me crazy occasionally but that's not very often."

He laughs. "Do you want to come in to the bakery for a second and take home a few cookies for Prim? Maybe it'll help her get better faster. Sugar cures everything."

"I don't have the money for that, but thanks. Prim should be fine in a day or two." I see the bakery up ahead as we come to a stop.

"Seriously, it's on the house. Take a few home. It's not a big deal." Peeta holds the door open for me. "Please?"

I pause as I watch him. He's smiling down at me, waiting for me to make up my mind. I shrug and walk inside. I'll probably pay for this later, but I know Prim loves the bakery and she's going to go crazy when she finds out I'm bringing home cookies for her. I take in a deep breath and instantly feel at home here. The air is warm and smells of spices and sugar. It smells absolutely delicious.

Peeta walks behind the counter and opens a drawer. He pulls out a small paper bag and walks to the case full of breads and cakes and other sweets. He slides open a door and uses a pair of tongs to pull out a few sugar cookies, which he promptly places into the paper bag. He closes the door and folds the bag shut as he places it in my hands. "For Prim." He smiles.

I look down at the bag and allow myself to show a small smile. I look back up at him as I walk towards the door. "Thanks, Peeta."

"Here, let me." I turn around and see him right in front of me. He grins and moves around me to hold the door open. "I'll see you at school tomorrow." He smiles. "Bye, Katniss."

Later that evening, Prim squeals with delight as I present her with the cookies after dinner when she is getting ready to go to bed. She sneezes and then takes them in her hands. "Where did you get these from, Katniss? They must have cost a fortune!" Her cheeks look like a chipmunk as she stuffs a whole cookie in her mouth. She closes her eyes and makes a noise of delight. "Yummmm. Want one?" Her question is mangled from all the food in her mouth.

I laugh and mess with her hair. "I got them from a friend. They're all for you. I hear a little bit of sugar can cure anything."

"Well, tell your friend at school tomorrow that I said thank you. These are so good."

I smooth her hair down as I pull her into a hug. "Of course I will, little duck." I release her and tuck the blankets in around her chin. "Good night. We have a long day ahead at school tomorrow."


	3. Chapter 3

"MOVE!"

I feel a strong hand push me into a locker. What the... ? I turn around and see a group of Merchant boys laughing and giving me looks. I roll my eyes.

"Seriously? You couldn't just say excuse me?" I stop and stare at them while I cross my arms. "Real nice."

"Just get out of our way next time." The leader of the group steps forward. It's Scott. Of course. He has tanned olive skin and light brown hair with angry green eyes. He is over a foot taller and has at least 70 pounds on me. He sneers at me as his eyes roam over me from head to toe. His lip curls up at me. "Stupid seam girl. You need to learn your place anyways." He takes a step closer. "The sooner the better."

Is this guy really trying to bully me? What did I ever do to him? I feel a fire burning in my chest as the anger builds.

"My place? I need to learn my place? My _place_ was where I was standing before you pushed me into that locker. Get over yourself," I say as I take a step closer to him to show him that I'm not afraid of him. "The sooner the better." My eyes are at level with his chest but I keep eye contact. The air between us cackles with tension. Up close, I can smell a slight sweaty scent radiating off of him. _Someone needs a shower._ I smile at the thought, and Scott looks angrier than ever. I glance down and see him clenching his fists repeatedly. I look back up and he is still staring at me. His face is turning red.

Peeta, out of nowhere, jumps in between us. "Hey Katniss. I was looking for you." He smiles at me. He gently pushes me back a little and faces the group leader. "Scott, will you please excuse us? This is important."

Scott backs away without breaking eye contact with me. He huffs at me then shrugs. "I have to go anyways. Come on, guys." He walks away.

Peeta waits until Scott is out of ear shot.

"What is _wrong_ with you? That guy is bad news!" Peeta exclaims as he runs a hand through his hair. It falls onto his forehead. "The last thing you need is to worry about having him out for your blood."

"I'm not afraid of him. He's just an arrogant jerk. Did you not see him push me into a locker? I was just defending myself!" I roll my eyes. "I have nothing to explain to you. Please excuse me." I try to push my way past him, but he grabs my hand.

"Katniss, seriously. He and his friends have a really bad reputation with starting trouble. At least let me walk you home. He might try something again if he's angry enough." I look at him. He sincerely seems worried as he shifts his weight to his other foot. He looks down at the floor and brings his blue eyes back up to meet mine. "Please." He looks down and sees he still has a grip on my fingers. He releases my hand.

"I can take care of myself, but fine. This time you can, if you're that worried." Thank God Prim is still out of school today for having a cold. The last thing I need is my little sister meeting a boy walking me home from school.

Peeta's eyes light up. He gives me a warm smile and puts a hand in his pocket. "Alright. Let's go then."

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><p>Peeta and I walk towards the Seam. Peeta is the one who breaks the silence between us. "So... what do you have planned for this weekend?" He glances at me. "I hear there will be a party over in the seam. Will you be attending?"<p>

"I don't really do parties. Besides, how did you hear about that? I thought Merchants didn't care about anything to do with the Seam." I pause. Even to me, that sounds mean. I look at Peeta and see his face fall. "Sorry. That came out wrong. But no, to answer your question, I'm not going."

"It's okay, I understand. To be honest, most people don't really pay attention.. but I do. I notice and hear alot of things people don't usually pay attention to." I stare at the ground. I can feel Peeta's eyes on me. "But you know, that sounds creepier that it was supposed to."

I remain silent as we keep walking.

"Did Prim like the cookies?"

I smile. "She loved them. Thank you. I thought her mouth was going to explode from all the sugar she crammed in it." I laugh. "But really, thanks. She went crazy for them."

Peeta gives me a small chuckle. His face becomes serious as he takes a deep breath. "You know, Katniss, I've always-"

"You know, you really don't have to walk me home. I don't think Scott is going to pop up any time soon. The seam is far out of your way."

"Not really, I don't mind the walk. Besides, it helps me put off going home for a little bit. I don't have to be at work until later on anyways. It helps take my mind off things."

"I really don't need protection. Seriously. We're about to be at your bakery. I'll just go the rest of the way home alone and you can go inside." We're at the entrance to his bakery now and slow to a stop. I hold my arm out to the door. "Ill see you later."

Peeta seemed hesitant. "Katniss, I really don't mind walking you home. It seems like you just don't want company though, so I'll let you go." He opened the door. "Just be careful." He smiles at me and walks inside.

I step down the stairs and continue home. As I round a corner, Scott walks out from behind a building. My heart quickens, but I act like I don't see him. He steps in front of me, blocking my path. I try walking around him, but he blocks me again.

"You can't get away so easy without your little lover boy here, can you?"

Again, I try to step out and around him, but he keeps blocking my path. "I just want to go home. Please move."

"Or what? What will you do? Sick your little baker boy on me? Tell me to get over myself? Bad mistake you made earlier, making a fool out of me in front of my friends. Very. Bad. Mistake." He narrows his eyes. "Just remember this... I know where you live. I know who you care about. That's all I'm saying."

My blood runs cold. Is he threatening me? The people I love?

I try again to start walking away as he steps to my left. He grabs my arm roughly, and I freeze. I twist my arm trying to get out of his grip, but he's got a much stronger grip than I thought. I wince in pain. "Let me go Scott. Now. You're hurting me." I push against his chest, trying to get myself free. He grabs my other wrist and holds on tight.

"Or what?" He sneers in my face.

"Just let me go."

He stares at me with anger in his eyes for an uncomfortably long time. I feel his grip on my wrists tighten even more. My heart starts racing even faster. I stare at him, and my thoughts begin to wander. What if he doesnt let go? Am I fast enough to get away if I get the chance?

Finally, he releases me, thrusting my arms far away from him. I stumble a few steps. He steps close, too close. His face appears merely inches from mine. "Stay out of my way." He disappears.

I rub my wrists where he grabbed them while I stand there for a few moments to regain my composure. As much as I don't want to admit being afraid, Scott is much bigger and stronger than I am. The fact that he actually got physical with me worries me, and the fact that he threatened me... It's not good. At all.


	4. Chapter 4

You are all amazing. Thanks for the reviews and thanks for subscribing to this story! I love you all!

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><p>I walk out of class and see him. My body freezes, and it's like someone has punched me in the stomach. He locks eyes with me and sneers, giving me an evil smile and winking as he gives me a sarcastic wave. My face flushes and I feel my wrists burn as I remember our last encounter yesterday evening. I spin around and walk in the other direction.<p>

I hear Scott call after me. "Where are you going, Katniss? What's wrong?" I turn my head and see he and his friends laughing. "Come back! We don't bite."

Tears well up in my eyes as I keep walking. He may not bite, but close enough. I don't know what it is about Scott but for the first time in my life I am literally terrified of a person. After getting cornered last night, I no longer feel like myself. Usually I feel strong and in control, but right now I feel weak and unstable. This is so unlike me and it's all because of him, all because of what he did yesterday. I take deep breaths to steady my breathing. I begin walking faster so that I can get home to Prim and my Mom and get away from this school.

"Katniss! Wait up!" I stop and see Peeta coming towards me. He touches my shoulder. "Did you get home alright yesterday? I was worried all night." His eyes are concentrated on my face.

My face falls slightly before I realize it. Don't cry, Katniss. Don't cry. My chest rises and falls as Peeta still waits for an answer. His eyebrows knit together as his gaze darkens. "What happened?" He steps closer to me and whispers, "Are you okay?" He brings his fingertips up to rest on my cheek. "Katniss?"

"Nothing, nothing happened. Everything is fine. Everything _was_ fine." I'm babbling. Why can't I look him in the eyes and lie? Concentrate, Katniss. I swallow hard and I look directly at Peeta. He raises an eyebrow and frowns. Why does he have to care so much? Why can't he be a typical guy and run away at the first sign of emotion from a girl?

"You don't look like it. You look like you're ready to fall apart at any second." He takes my hand and leads me to a bench. We both sit down. I sit and stare straight ahead willing myself to feel nothing while he turns so his entire body is facing me. He has so much concern in his eyes that if I even look at him I get tears in my eyes. I want to tell him everything but I don't want to drag him into anything. Besides, I barely know him to begin with.

"I'm fine, Peeta." My voice cracks as I say his name. I shake my head and clear my throat. "Really."

"No, you're not. I can tell when you're lying. What happened?"

I barely know this boy but he can read me like a book, which slightly annoys me. "What do you mean you can tell when I'm lying? I'm not lying. You hardly know me, Peeta. I'm fine. I'm great. _Peachy_."

God, I suck at lying.

"You suck at lying."

Yepp.

"If I say I'm fine, I'm fine. Leave it alone." My voice is cold. I don't want to do this. I can't do this. I just want to go home and get away. Why does he keep trying to get involved? I know he's just trying to help, but I'm trying to protect him. The last thing that I want is for Scott to set his eyes on Peeta and me both.

"I'm just trying to help. If you need to talk, I don't want you feeling like there's no one there to listen. I'm here, Katniss. I'm right here."

"Honestly, I don't want to talk about it. I'll see you later." I get up to leave. Peeta grabs my forearm, the same one Scott grabbed yesterday. It's still tender, and I cry out in pain. Peeta immediately retracts his arm as if it's on fire.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... Wait. What is that? Katniss, what's on your arm?" His eyes are focused on a spot on my wrist.

I look down and see the bruise on my right wrist exposed. To my dismay, I woke up this morning with angry marks on both of my wrists leftover from my meeting with Scott the night before. I had to dig through my closet to find a shirt with long enough sleeves to cover both arms. The only problem is, if my shirt sleeve rides up even a little, they show. By now my wrists are a shade of blue. His eyebrows furrow in concern.

I pull my sleeve down. "It's nothing." I refuse to make eye contact with him as I pull the fabric over my fingers. I don't want them to get exposed again. "Just a little bruise from a bump I took on my bed last night."

"A bump from your bed."

"Yeah."

He sighs and gently takes my hands. "You can trust me, Katniss. Let me see." His blue eyes soften as they lock eyes with mine as I look up. "Please?" I bite my lip. His thumbs run over mine in a coaxing manner. I relax my hands while he turns my wrists over and slowly pulls up my sleeves.

My wrist tingles as Peeta delicately touches the bruise. He runs his fingertips over the finger print marks Scott left. He takes my other hand in his and inspects the other wrist as well. His hands slowly return down to hold mine as he gives them a squeeze. Normally this much contact freaks me out, but Peeta's touch calms me. He takes a deep breath and sighs, but he's not letting go of my hands. "I knew I should have walked you home. I shouldn't have let you leave." He lets out a loud sigh. "I'm so sorry, Katniss. I'm so stupid. This is all my fault."

I don't answer. I'm in a trance as I stare at our hands, still entwined. It's funny how one person's hands bruise, while another's hands soothes.

"Katniss?"

"It's not your fault."

Peeta rolls his eyes. "Katniss, come on."

"It's not. You couldn't have stopped it. I couldn't even stop it. I did everything right and I tried not to make him angry."

"What did he do?"

"He threatened me."

Peeta blue eyes darken, and he doesn't say anything for a long time. His jaw tenses and his lips purse together.

"We have a problem."


	5. Chapter 5

"Peeta, I don't want any more trouble. I just want to pretend like nothing happened. Okay?" This is going to be easier said than done. Peeta has a look of pure anger and determination on his face. After I told him the details of everything that had happened, he was angrier than I have ever seen him before. His body turned to pure stone, his fists were clenched and his eyes seemed like they turned black. At first he insisted on going to the school authorities, but I finally talked him out of it. "The school authorities won't be able to do anything. He hasn't technically done anything on campus, and no one else witnessed it. It was only me and him. It's my word against his. I'm probably just overreacting, it's not a big deal. Nothing bad happened."

"He grabbed you so hard that he left bruises! He threatened you! Frankly, to see that he scared you this much is what's making me upset."

"I'm not afraid of Scott."

"Yesterday you sounded like you would take down Scott in a heartbeat if the situation ever occurred. Now he threatens you and you dont want any trouble? The regular Katniss would never back down. Especially if someone she loved was threatened."

My jaw tenses as I take in what he's saying. My eyes become steely as I glare at him. "I'm not backing down on anything. He won't do anything. It's fine. Besides, how do you know what regular Katniss does? We barely know each other. I don't need anyone taking care of me. I've been taking care of my family for a long time alone. I can handle things myself."

"I know you've been taking care of your family, Katniss. Since you were a little girl. You're always making sure you're providing for other people, always putting others first." My eyes flash to his face. I don't reply. He watches my face for a few moments until he realizes I'm not giving him a response.

Peeta rolls his eyes. "Either way, I'm walking you home for the next few days. It's okay to have someone help you, too, Katniss. It's okay to let someone in." He steps closer to me and takes my hands in his. "I won't let him hurt you again. I don't want you to be afraid. I want you to feel safe with me." He gives them a squeeze, and releases them.

"I do feel safe with you." My cheeks burn as I realize I just said that out loud, even if it is true.

Peeta gives me a big smile. "Good." His cheeks turn a light shade of pink.

"If you're walking us home, we need to think of a story to tell Prim and my mother. I don't want them to get suspicious of anything."

Peeta grins. "I don't think that'll be a problem."

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><p>"Prim! Ready to go home?" I see her running towards me, her pigtails flopping in the wind. I can't help it but smile and laugh. She looks like a little puppy with oversized ears. She keeps running straight at me until I realize she's not slowing down. I brace myself as she slams in to me, wrapping her small arms around my waist and giving me a bear hug. I laugh as I pull her up. She looks at other person with us.<p>

"Who is this with you?" Prim looks at Peeta, inspecting him close up. She wrinkles her nose as she inspects him up and down. I can tell when she recognizes him from the other day when her eyes light up and she grins at him. She turns around and pops her hands on her hips, her back to him and facing me. "Is this that boy?" she mouths to me.

I wink at her and introduce him. "This is my classmate, Peeta. I'm going to be tutoring him in English for a little while at the house after school."

"Hi Peeta! Nice to meet you." She grabs his hand for a hand shake. He laughs.

"Hi, Prim. How was your day at school?" He ruffles Prim's hair a bit. She giggles and skips forward a few paces.

"It was fun! We learned about art today. We drew pictures. Wanna see?" She digs in her pocket for a second and produces a folded up piece of paper. She unfolds it and shows it to us.

"Wow, Prim. This is nice." Peeta's not lying. She drew her little friend from the other day, Lizzie the lizard. Although it isn't perfect, it's good for a girl her age. I'm impressed.

"I love art. I draw and paint. Not alot since art supplies are so expensive, but I enjoy it. I started when I was around your age, actually." He bumps shoulders with my little sister. "At the rate you're going, you're going to be way better than me when you're my age." He winks at her.

"No way! Can I see some of your drawings one day? Or a painting? Please?" Prim grabs Peeta's hand and shakes it gently, back and forth. She gives him her puppy dog look that no one can deny. It doesn't help that her pigtails are flopping again as she's walking.

"Of course. Maybe I'll bring something tomorrow." He laughs. "But only if you stop giving me that look. Who did you learn that from? Your sister? I bet she can get whatever she wants from people with a look like that." He gives me a big smile.

"Actually, no. I don't know where she got that from." I pull Prim in front of me and away from Peeta. "Stop bugging him." Prim pouted. "And don't pout like that. It's not polite." Peeta chuckles at us.

We come to our house and Prim and I show Peeta the way in. He and I walk into my bedroom for more privacy. As he walks in, he makes his way to stand in front of a wall. I come to stand next to him as I look at where his gaze is leading to. A photo of my family is hanging by itself in front of him. It's one taken from when my father was still alive, back when my mother wasn't apathetic to the world. She's gotten better now, but it comes and goes in waves, depending on her moods. When I was young, my father took care of us. He would go to work while Prim and I went to school. Mom would stay home and cook and clean for us everyday. We weren't like Merchant families, who don't struggle as much as others from District Twelve, but we didn't have a terrible life either.

I remember going out and playing and being a kid without having a care in the world, and coming home at night exhausted- not from working and worrying, but just from using all that energy just to have fun. I would run in the house at night, and my father would be sitting in his chair, his arms wide open and waiting for me to crawl in his lap exhausted from my day. Most nights I would fall asleep in his arms and he would carry me to bed, tucking me in and kissing me on the forehead. I now do that with Prim at night. I learned from the best.

The day we all heard about the explosion in the mines, it was chaos. School let out early and the first thing I did was go to Prim's classroom and pick her up. She was sitting in shock waiting at her desk. We pushed through the crowds to get to the mines grasping hands with terror in our hearts. We waited for our father to come out of the black abyss, only to leave with empty hands. It was the worst day of my life.

"Do you miss him?"

For a moment, I had forgotten he was standing next to me. I turn to face him and give a small smile. "Yes. More than anything." I look back at the photo. I would give literally anything to have him back, to see him again, if only for a moment.

"I don't know what I would do without my father." His eyes are focused on the photo. "He's the one I turn to when I don't know what to do. My brothers are always too busy with their own lives for me, and my mom is just... my mom. My dad is my best friend. You're so strong to be able to go through something like that and still be able to be there for your family. I don't think I could do that."

"When you know your family is depending on you, you'd be surprised at what you can do." When I realized my mom wasn't emotionally ready to be there for us, I took the reigns. Gone were the days of me playing into the sunset. I started hunting when we couldn't afford to buy groceries. I traded game for goods to bring home. I helped Prim with homework. I couldn't work, but I did what I could around the house to help out. Slowly, mom started to come back around. Now and then I see glimpses of the bubbly mother I used to know and love. I miss her.

"Or maybe you're just special."

"Maybe I am."

We're smiling at each other. I chuckle and shake my head.

"So what exactly are we going to do today?"

"You're tutoring me for English, of course."

"What?" I'm genuinely confused. Since when does he need help with English?

"I need help on my paper." He smiles wide at me.

"_Great."_

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><p>Later that night, Prim gives Peeta a hug as he gets ready to leave. He seems surprised at this, but returns the hug. He wraps his arms around Prim and lifts her off the ground as she squeals. She runs away and Peeta faces me. He grins.<p>

"She's a good kid. I like her."

I give him a warm smile. "Yeah. Thanks for walking us home. I had fun today."

"Me too. Goodnight Katniss. I'll see you tomorrow at school." He touched my shoulder as he walked past me to leave.

I could still my shoulder tingle in that exact spot hours later as I drift to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello loves! I am SO sorry it took me a little bit longer to update than usual. I need to try and get started on a regular update day so it's not so random... Thank you all for subscribing and please review! The more reviews, the sooner I'll update! :]**

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><p>"Peeta, I promise you, <em>I'm fine<em>. You can stop walking us home every day!" I trudge alongside him down the hallway after our English class. He has walked us home every day for weeks now. So far, no signs of Scott. "I'm pretty sure if Scott hasn't tried anything yet, he won't anytime soon."

"Knowing your luck the day I don't walk the two of you home he'll do what he did last time. I just feel better knowing you get home safe at night, Katniss. I promise, it's not a big deal." He looks down as we continue walking. "I mean, unless you just want me to stop walking you home. You know that I'm not trying to intrude on you and Prim or anything, right?"

Does he think he's intruding on us? I feel like someone has just punched me in the stomach. I hate to think that I've hurt him just for not wanting to bother him and his personal time. "No, no, no. I just don't want you to feel obligated to walk us home every day. I know you probably have better things to do than to walk two girls from the Seam home. I know you have to be getting back late and I don't want you getting in trouble or anything. I don't want _us_ to intrude on _you_, not the other way around."

Peeta smiles. "You could never make me feel obligated to walk you home, Katniss. I enjoy spending time with you."

"I like spending time with you too."

Peeta's face lights up just a little. My eyes flutter downwards as I feel my cheeks blush.

That moment disappears as I feel a harsh shove causing me to start falling towards Peeta. He catches me in his arms and pulls me up. As I steady myself his hands linger on my back as I see Scott pass by us.

He turns back and winks at me. "Sorry, didn't see you there, Kat."

"Her name is Katniss." Peeta's voice is loud and strong, echoing down the hallway. His steely eyes watch Scott. He lowers his voice. "And it looked like you saw her to me." I look back and forth between the two of them. I feel my feet move to place myself next to Peeta and my heart's steady beat begins to pick up its pace.

Scott stops in his tracks, turns around and comes closer to us. He stands directly in front of Peeta. "What are you trying to say, Mellark? It was an accident."

"I'm sure it was." Peeta gives him a steady stare, unwavering as Scott's eyes flicker down the hallway. "Next time you should be more careful. The school authorities might not see it that way."

Scott's jaw tenses as it juts out. His chest puffs out just a little as he fixes his gaze on me. "I guess I'll have to be more careful around here then." I step a little closer to Peeta and look at him. I still haven't said a word to Scott since our last meeting, and I don't intend to any time soon.

"I guess you do." His eyes are dark and he takes my hand as he leads us outside to meet Prim. We leave him standing alone in the middle of the hallway. He is clenching his fists and his face is turning redder by the second. But as long as I have Peeta by my side, I don't care.

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><p>"I think you made him angry," I whisper as Prim walks up.<p>

"He'll survive." I look at him in surprise. He smiles down at me. "What? He will. He's a big boy."

I chuckle. "Wasn't it you who said not to make him angry? That's he's a force to be reckoned with?"

"He shouldn't do things and get away with it all the time." His face hardens. "Especially to people who don't deserve it."

As soon as Prim is within a few feet of us he turns off his anger and his face lights up.

"Where's your drawings?" Prim bounces up and down as she waits on Peeta to show her his latest drawing he brings every day to show her after school. It turns out that he really is a fantastic artist; he has a way of capturing beauty through pencil and paper that I've never seen before. Today, he shows us a drawing he did of his father. It's gorgeous, simple. The light catches his face on one side and his hair is a little unkempt, just like Peeta's. Also like Peeta's are his fathers eyes. They have a gentleness in them, yet they still manage to exude strength. In the background is a counter and an oven. Obviously this was drawn from inside his parents bakery.

"I did this one day when I was supposed to be working. It was slow and my dad told me to do whatever I wanted, so I drew a portrait of him. My mom walked in right as I finished and got really angry, though." His eyes darken. "I haven't drawn at work since."

"Well that's a shame because this is really good. I'm sure your dad likes it alot too." Prim gave a huge smile and walked ahead of us. She pauses. "Katniss, is it okay if I go ahead and run home? I want to get a head start on my homework for tonight. I promise I'll be careful."

"Sure, little duck. No pit stops, go straight home." Prim takes off in a sprint. I don't know where that girl gets all of her energy from, but if I had half of it I'd get a whole lot more done.

Peeta and I walk in silence for a few moments. I take a deep breath.

"Peeta, I've been wondering something, but I don't want to intrude." I glance over at him, and he nods, giving me approval to ask my question. "Do you get along with your mother? I mean, I've heard things about her from people at school, but you don't really say much about her. I don't mean to be rude."

He bites his lip and looks away. "Yeah, I don't talk about her much. It's not that I hate her, but she's not exactly my favorite person, either. We just don't see eye to eye on many things." We pause so he can bend down and tie a shoelace. He kneels with the laces in his hands and looks up at me. "Why do you ask?"

"No reason. Just curious." I watch him. "A while ago I saw you before you walked into the bakery and you seemed really hesitant to walk in, like you were bracing yourself for impact is all. I'm sorry, I'll just let it go. I shouldn't have asked."

"No, no, no, it's okay. If we're going to be friends, we'll have to talk about the hard stuff occasionally." He stands and runs his fingers through his hair and sighs. "My mother is a difficult person, honestly. Says whatever is on her mind, no matter who it may hurt. She's mean, stubborn."

"Like how?"

He pauses. Bites his lip. "One time when I was little we went to a store and I had asked her to hold my jacket for me. She sat it down and forgot to pick it up and someone else stole it by the time she got a chance to go back and get it. When she got home I got yelled at for an hour straight. Her exact words were, 'Of all the kids in the world, why did I have to have the stupidest one?' I was only five years old. I heard things like that, all the time. As the years have gone on, she's just gotten worse."

Yeah, like smacking him in the head for burning a loaf of bread. I hoped that was a one time occurance, but I doubt it. I wonder if Peeta has ever said anything to anyone else other than me. I blink. My stomach churns as I allow myself to think about what he has most likely endured his entire life due to his mother. I shake my head furiously.

"You know that's not your fault, right? That's her problem. No mother should say things like that to her child."

"Well yeah, I know that _now_. But when I was young, I didn't. Growing up with her only made me stronger because it made me want to be her opposite. Everything she is, I try not to be. I just want to be me without hurting anyone else in the process." He looks at me. "Does that make sense? I must sound stupid."

I stare, transfixed at this boy in front of me. I'm finally starting to really see who he is. He's always showing me pieces of himself and slowly I'm starting to connect them together to see the bigger whole. He's not someone who is charming others to get what he wants in life; he's naturally a kind person at heart. He always puts other people before himself in order to protect them, even me. "It doesn't sound stupid. You're a great guy, Peeta. You could never be your mother. You'll never _be_ your mother. You're much too sweet for that."

I can feel my cheeks burn as I finish the last sentence. These last few weeks we've grown alot closer. Something about him makes me want to open up more, to expose myself more, which is odd because I typically keep myself closed off from people. The only person I truly open up with is my sister, the only person I truly trust is my sister; but I could see Peeta possibly being another person I could come to deeply trust, in time. I'm not sure what that means exactly, but I could.


	7. Chapter 7

Today I'm going into town with Peeta to run some errands. I have to buy a few medical supplies for mom and he has to pick up some groceries for the bakery, but he said he might want to get a few art supplies as well. This is the first time we're going out to a public place together, just us. At first when he tried to get me to come with him I refused because I didn't want people to get the wrong idea that he and I are dating. He kept bugging me and bugging me though so in the end I complied. After I agreed to come with him I realized I don't really care what people say. We're not dating, we're just friends. If people talk let them talk. We know the truth.

I go to the market occasionally but not very often because I prefer the Hob. Everyone knows each other and they tend to make better deals with you, and I can usually trade hunted game for goods instead of money. Medical supplies aren't available there, so we have to save up some money for the good stuff every month. Prim usually gathers all the herbs we need outdoors but things like syringes and strong medications we have to purchase from the market. We usually buy it in stock so we don't have to visit the market very often. We have a guy named Grovin that we buy from. He's old, and we've bought from him since I was a little girl.

I meet Peeta at the bakery and we set off for our destination. As we're walking, Peeta chuckles to himself. I look at him. "What's so funny?" I look down at myself to make sure I don't have anything out of place or on me.

He shakes his head, laughing. "No, nothing, not you. I was just remembering earlier today. You know how I have to wake up super early in the morning to bake before we open?" I nod my head. He tells me everything about the bakery. He usually wakes up at 5am every morning to have everything ready when they open at 8am. "This morning I was baking up some cupcakes to put in the case and I was mixing up the icing in the mixer. I was pouring some powdered sugar in and my brother came in out of nowhere and scared me to death. The mixer was on high speed and I accidentally poured too much sugar in and the mixer flew it everywhere. I was covered in sugar from head to toe. I just looked down and saw that I missed some of it on my shoe." I look down, and sure enough the toe of his shoe is caked in a white powdery substance.

"Looks like you've got some sweet feet there, Peeta."

He bursts out laughing. "Sad thing is, it happens all the time."

"It's okay. The other day I was out back milking Prim's goat. I'm sitting there with a bucket under her, doing my thing, and all of a sudden she just takes off running. The bucket goes flying and I'm standing there speechless because I'm covered in goat's milk when I notice she's run out of the gate and down the road. It took me an hour to finally get her back in the pen. I smelled disgusting. At least you got dirty and smelled like sugar."

He tilts his head back, cracking up. "I wish I could have seen that! I bet you were furious."

"I was! I thought I was going to murder her. Prim had to calm me down and run a bath for me. I was ready to seriously injure that goat, I'm telling you," I say as we walk into the market. I look around. We start walking down one long line of booths. I dig in my pocket for my money as we come up to the man we usually buy our medical supplies from. He smiles at me as he pulls out a bag and sits it on the table. He sits down in his chair, his cane bumping against the table as he rests it against the edge of it.

"How your momma, Katniss? Is she doing alright?" He gives Peeta a nod and looks back at me.

"She's fine, Grovin. She says hello," I say as I hand over the money. "We'll be back next month for supplies again. You know the deal."

He gives me a nod. "I'll be here with the usual. See you soon, darlin'." I give him a smile.

We start in the other direction towards the baking goods. We pass a table when something catches my eye. I pause, resting my hand on the table top. I pick up the item that caught my attention. It's a tiny rock, polished and shined and glossy. It's white and round and almost resembles a pearl but bigger in scale. It's beautiful. I set it back down.

"Do you like it?" Peeta reaches from behind me and picks it up. He holds it in his hand, inspecting it.

"It's gorgeous," I reply. "Your work is beautiful," I say to the crafter. The woman behind the table gives me a small smile. I know it's too expensive for me, and so does she. Little baubles like that never hold much appeal for me because I just don't see myself paying for something like that when I know there's something else I could spend that kind of money on. The whole table is covered in different rocks in different colors and shapes and sizes. Some are polished to the point where they look like glass and others are jagged and organic looking.

I return her smile and leave Peeta behind as I move on to the next table, which has candles and other scented items on it. I pick up a candle and lift it to my nose. Vanilla. It reminds me of Peeta and I smile. I glance back at him when I hear him talking to the woman. His face is lit up. He waves goodbye, walking up to the table I'm at to stand next to me. He picks up a candle and inhales. He smiles. "It never fails. This is my favorite scent."

"What is it?" I pick up the candle, sniffing it. I smile. I'm not surprised at all. Cinnamon Spice. It's warm and inviting, reminding me of cold winters of cuddling up in blankets with Prim to keep warm. I set it back down. "That smells great. You almost ready?"

"Yeah. I just need to grab a few baking stuff and we can get out of here."

"You don't want to grab those art supplies?" He told me he's been saving his money for a bit and might buy some new paint brushes.

"Nah, I can wait for those. It's not a big deal." He nods in the direction of the bakery booth set up a few feet down.

As we come up to the booth, I breathe in the scent of spices and sweets. It smells just like Peeta after he's had a day in the bakery. Behind the person manning the cash register I see rows and rows of different spices contained in small plastic bags on tops of shelves. Huge bags of flour and sugar are on the floor piled on top of each other. I see a container with cooking utensils and a small glass case up front filled with baked goods to sell to hungry customers. Peeta hands the man some money and recieves a medium sized bag. He opens it to see assorted spices and bottles of colored liquid inside.

"Food coloring," he explains as he sees my confusion at the bottles. "For the icings and colored sweets we sell." I nod. I didn't know they sold bottles that big of food coloring- I've seen the tiny ones at the regular store, but the ones he's purchasing are like the size of the glasses we use at home to drink out of.

My head twitches to the right as I raise my eyebrow. I could have sworn I heard someone calling my name.

"Did you hear that?" I look around and look back at Peeta.

"Yeah, I did," he says as he looks around. He chuckles. "I think I found what it was," he says. He points as a figure is coming towards us. I squint and groan. Madge is quickly making her way over to us.

"_Great_." This is going to be awkward, I guarantee it. She already thinks Peeta likes me as it is and we're together shopping at the market which doesn't help at all. Madge is giving me a huge smile when she pulls me into a hug.

"Hi Katniss! Fancy seeing you here. What are you guys doing?" She smiles at me. Before I have a chance to reply, her eyes flicker to Peeta and widen. "Peeta? What are you doing here? Keeping Katniss company?"

He's speechless for a quick second. "Uh... I'm buying groceries?" She nods at him. She looks back at me, and back at him again. She's trying so hard to contain her smile that she's giving off this goofy lopsided grin. I groan inwardly. Please, Madge, don't make this awkward for me.

"Interesting. And you two came together? To buy groceries?" She pokes me. "I feel like I'm missing out on something here."

Peeta and I look at each other. I step in front of him, facing madge, so he can't see my face. _Stop it_, I mouth to her. My eyebrows go up and I give her a look of death.

"What? I'm not doing anything. Come on, move, I want to talk to Peeta." She pushes me out of the way. She purses her lips and puts her hands on her hips. "So, Peeta, tell me. What are your intentions with my friend Katniss?"

"...What?" His eyes widen and his face turns beet red.

I throw my hands up in the air. "MADGE! Stop it! Geez!" I grab her arm and pull her away from Peeta to the side. "I swear, I am going to murder you," I whisper angrily. "Leave us alone!"

"If nothing is going on, why are you getting so mad?" She winks at me and raises her eyebrows a few times. "Come on, Katniss, tell momma Madge everything."

"Momma madge? What are you talking about? You are insane." I look back at Peeta. He's staring at the floor, his cheeks still red as ever. He looks mortified. "We have to go. I'll see you later." I walk away and pull Peeta with me as we leave Madge behind. "Go go go go go!"

"You guys! Come on! I'm just trying to get the scoop!" She's still calling out to us as we run out of the market.

We walk in silence for a long time. I can tell Peeta is embarassed, and I don't blame him. I am too. I can't believe Madge put us both on the spot like that. He probably thinks she and I gossip all the time when in reality I try my best to steer her away from it. I keep trying to think of what to say about what just happened but my mind keeps coming to a blank. I glance at him. He's looking at the ground and biting his lip.

I hate you, Madge.

"Peeta, I'm really sorry about that. Madge tends to get carried away sometimes." I swallow the lump in my throat. I take a deep breath and sigh. "Seriously, I'm sorry."

"It's really fine. Don't worry about it. I just wasn't epecting that, that's all." He laughs. "She's got a lot of spunk. She just cares about you is all." He nudges me with his elbow. "Nothing to be sorry about. Don't worry." He pauses. "Except for her calling herself Momma Madge. What was that about?"

I burst out laughing. "I have no idea. She's so crazy, I swear." When he doesn't say anything for awhile, I look at him.

Peeta's eyes are concentrated on the road ahead and they darken as his jaw tenses. My eyes follow to where his rest. The blood drains from my face.

Scott is standing in the middle of the road with a look of pure rage in his eyes. In his hand is a knife.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello lovelies! Just a heads up: for now on I'm going to start trying to update every Friday or Saturday. Or, if you're lucky, Thursdays- but only if I get alot of reviews! Also, I want to give a huge heartfelt thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far and those of you who have subscribed to this story. You all truly make me want to keep writing and you keep me excited for this and what it holds in the future. You're all amazing! :]**

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><p>"Peeta..." I am in a state of panic as I start looking for a route of escape. My eyes dart back and forth as I take in the area surrounding us, but I see nothing that can help us. We're basically on an empty road. There's not many buildings to run around with somewhere to go inside and lock ourselves up.<p>

It's us and Scott.

It's us with nowhere to go.

"Peeta, he has a knife. What are we going to do? We have nowhere to go. We're trapped." He pulls me close and runs his hands up and down my arms.

"Shhhhh," he says as Scott comes closer. He faces me and cups my face in his hands. "It'll be okay. If you get a chance, run." He watches Scott out of the corner of his eyes and slowly takes in a deep breath.

"I'm not leaving you, Peeta."

His eyes lock on mine and soften. He opens his mouth to say something back, but I cut him off before he gets a chance to say it.

"I'm not." I shake my head and close my eyes, cupping his hands with mine. I mean it. He sighs and takes my hand in his. He stands by my side as we wait for Scott.

"Well, well, well, look who we have here." He approaches and stares at us. "The two love birds from the opposite sides of the track. I told you Peeta, you can do better than a girl from the Seam. There's so many other girls to choose from, yet you insist on keeping her in your company. Such a shame. You have so much potential." My blood boils as I take in his words. So that's what Scott must have said that first day to Peeta after I bumped into him. I glance over and see Peeta's eyes flashing in anger.

"There's no one else I'd rather spend my time with, Scott. Thanks for your concern, though." His voice is steely and sharp. Peeta steps in front of me, shielding me from Scott. He doesn't let go of my hand and squeezes it reassuringly.

My eyes keep flickering to the knife in Scott's hand. My heart feels like it's about to beat out of my chest. Does he plan on using that on us? Is he that crazy? A bully at school is one thing, but bringing a knife into it? That's so irrational. Something is wrong with him. Very wrong. I look closely at him and see a sheen of sweat on his forehead. His eyes seem unable to focus on what's going on around him.

"Still being a foolish boy, I see." Scott sloppily takes a step closer. "I'm going to need to talk to Katniss for a few moments. I'm sure you don't mind. Just run along home now." He does a waving motion, dismissing Peeta, but Peeta makes no move. A few awkward seconds pass.

"Did you hear me? _Leave_." His voice is louder and his eyes narrow as they fix on Peeta's face. Scott blinks a few times, and shakes his head, focusing again on Peeta. My eyebrows furrow together as I question his movements and overall demeanor. Is he on drugs or something? He's acting much more odd than usual. Peeta is focusing completely on him, watching his every move and every gesture.

"No, I think I'm good." He smiles and holds his stance. To a casual observer one would think he's just politely engaging in conversation with a very hostile person. I can see he is preparing for battle, similar to a lion stalking its prey. With every movement Scott makes, Peeta mirrors it, blocking his view of me.

"I told you to get out of here, Mellark. Go."

"Whatever you have to say to her, I'm sure she doesn't mind if I hear it." His head turns around and his eyes flicker to me. "Do you, Katniss?" I shake my head. No way was he leaving me here alone with Scott. He wouldn't do that, not in a million years. He's too good to actually worry about himself in a situation like this.

"I mind. Get out of here." I can tell Scott is get angrier by the second. His voice is getting louder and louder. He twirls the knife through his fingers, playing with the sharp tip of it as his eyes watch me feverently. I can feel my hands trembling in Peeta's.

"I told Katniss I wasn't going to let you hurt her again." He stares at Scott without faltering. "I intend to keep that promise." He stands up a fraction of an inch straighter. His thumb rubs back and forth against mine. My eyes drift down to them and I feel butterflies swirling in my stomach. I'm not sure where they're coming from, the touch of Peeta's fingers or the looming danger in front of us.

This takes him aback for a millisecond, but he quickly recovers. "I don't know what you're talking about." He looks at me. "She's telling lies as usual. I didn't touch her." He sneers. He begins to step around Peeta and towards me but Peeta blocks his path, putting him at eye level with Scott, about a foot away from him.

"Are you sure about that? Katniss isn't one for lying." His eyes are menacing and accusatory, his face hard as a rock as he lets his words sink in. "As a matter of fact, I've never heard her tell a lie. Ever."

"If I said she was lying, she was lying." His eyes flicker down to the ground and he reaches up to scratch his neck. He looks uncomfortable as Peeta's glare intensifies.

"A few weeks ago, you cornered Katniss and threatened her as she was walking home. You grabbed her and wouldn't let her leave, even when she was trying her hardest not to provoke you. The next day at school she refused to tell me what happened. In the end, she didn't say anything to me, I just saw the bruises you left. Then I made her tell me everything."

Peeta looks back at me for a second. I see something in his eyes I've never seen- or noticed- before: a sense of protectiveness over me. He pulls me forward just a tad by pulling my hands closer to him. My nose is now lightly pressed against his back. I rest my forehead against him, breathing him in, trying to calm my nerves. I peek around at Scott but quickly realize that's a mistake; he's looking at me with a face full of pure hatred and anger. His chest is rising and falling rapidly and his eyes don't leave mine. I'm the first to break eye contact, burying my face into Peeta's back again.

"She's lying. I barely touched her." He jerks his head in my direction. "She just wants attention, that's all. She's trash. She's a liar."

"She's not trash and she's not a liar."

"You're sure about that?"

"Iam."

Scott is silent.

"And by the way, you did touch her. You just admitted it."

His eyes flash. "I didn't admit anything."

"Maybe not in exact words, but you did." Peeta smiles.

"Today is not the day to mess with me, Mellark. Walk away."

"Are you kidding me? You have a _knife_ in your hand. It's not happening." He motions to the weapon in Scott's hand. He smiles and looks down as if he forgot about the deadly knife he has been grasping during our entire conversation. He looks up at us and chuckles.

"What, this? It's just a little pocketknife. Is it scaring you?" He holds it up at Peeta's face level. He turns it around in his hand so it reflects sunlight into Peeta's face. I stop breathing. Peeta goes completely still and doesn't say a word. Scott laughs. "Don't worry. I wasn't planning on using it on Katniss. I just wanted to scare her a little."

"It's not funny."

"What's not funny?" Scott slowly touches it to Peeta's cheek. He drags it down slowly. I gasp. My hands are squeezing Peeta's so hard I must be making his fingers lose circulation.

"Put the knife away," he says slowly and quietly. His jaws are clenched tight and his blue eyes are staring at the knife as Scott pulls it away from his face and holds it down at thigh level again. He takes a step toward Peeta again, now only putting them a few inches apart. His eyes seem like they have a film covering them. They appear hazy and unclear.

They're too close now.

Too close for comfort for me.

I don't like this, I don't like this at all.

Peeta and Scott are now face to face and their noses are almost touching. My heart begins to race. I place my hands on Peeta's hips and try to pull him back gently, but he doesn't budge. I can feel a slight tremor in his body. His arms are tense and ready to pounce at any moment now. The tension is escillating with every second.

The three of us are silent. After a few moments, Scott starts laughing uncontrollably. I jump at the sudden loud noise. Confused, I make eye contact with Peeta, but obviously he doesn't know what's going on either. We both stand there while Scott continues laughing. He seems like he's not in control of his emotions and actions as he doubles over cracking up at something the two of us have no knowledge about. This is scarier to me than anything so far. I'd much rather him be angry and coherent with a knife than be high on drugs with one. This makes him crazy. This makes him unpredictable.

This makes him lethal.

I whisper quietly so that only Peeta can hear me. "Come on, Peeta. It's not worth it." I try again to pull him back and away from Scott but he still won't budge.

Scott speaks first. His face is red and his jaw is tense. He addresses me."I told you to keep your mouth shut. I warned you to stay out of my way. What's wrong with you?" He tries to come at me around Peeta again, but Peeta steps in his path again. His back is rock hard and tense, as are his muscles in his neck. He still hasn't said a word but the look in his eyes is showing a completely different side of the boy I know.

He looks dangerous. Smoldering.

I want so bad to say something back to Scott, to go off on him and make him shut up, but I know me saying even a single word will set Scott off into a rampage. With Peeta between us, I don't want him to get seriously hurt. Not because of me.

I don't know what I would do if he wasn't here right now.

"If you have something to say, say it to me. Leave her out of it." Peeta is now visibly shaking in anger. His legs are twitching and I can tell he is both mentally and physically prepared for whatever is about to happen. All he's thinking about right now is how to protect me, no matter what. This scares me more than anything, that he's prepared to go into a fight with someone who is armed with a knife versus him with nothing but his sheer strength.

"Or else."

"Or else? Or else what?" Scott looks away, then turns back sharply. "This?" Scott's fist flies straight towards Peeta's face.


	9. Chapter 9

**So originally I was going to update this Thursday just because I love you all so much, but I never got around to it. Sorry! HOWEVER, since I didn't get this updated Thursday, I made it extra long. As always, I would greatly appreciate it if you would leave me a review, even if it's just a few words! Those little things really keep me going. :] I hope you enjoy it!**

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><p>Scott's enormous fist goes flying and Peeta swiftly ducks out of the way. The two boys circle each other for a few seconds. Peeta is watching his every move, and Scott seems to be waving back and forth as he stands there with a knife in one hand and his other hand balled up in a fist. He takes a step forward but loses his balance for a split second and Peeta uses that to his advantage, wrestling him to the ground. He grips the knife in between them trying to get it out of Scott's hands. They're both deep in concentration, blood vessels straining on their foreheads.<p>

Suddenly, Scott starts laughing again. "Do you really think you can beat me in a fight? You must be joking."

Peeta's eyes go black for a moment and I see him take a deep breath as he uses his strength against Scott, slowly twisting both of their wrists until the knife falls out of Scott's hand. Peeta grabs the knife and chucks it towards me and I kick it away as far as I can. Peeta turns to face him again as Scott's punch connects with Peeta's jaw. Reeling from the impact, he falls flat on the ground.

Scott starts looking for the knife but can't find it. I'm still watching him, frozen in place, until his eyes focus on me.

"Oh no, you don't." I try to run in the other direction but Scott catches my arm before I can get away. His hold on my arm is so tight that I cry out, but he ignores me and starts screaming in my face as I continue to try to get out of his grasp.

"Are you happy now? Are you _happy_?" He shoves me down, hard, to the ground. I feel something sharp and I have a bright flash of pain. I look down and see a jagged tree root sticking out from the ground underneath me. I reach around to my back, and as I draw my hand back up I see that it's covered in blood. I glance back up to see Scott hovering directly over me. I see Peeta yelling something as I see Scott's leg draw back to kick me while I'm still on the ground. I shut my eyes and brace myself for impact but it never comes.

I open my eyes and watch the scene before me. The boys are both shouting as Peeta jumps on Scott and pulls him away from me. His eyes are black and raging as he picks Scott up completely off the ground and throws him down on his back, hard. I'm frozen as Peeta lands a punch directly to Scott's nose, which begins bleeding profusely. Peeta starts coming towards me but Scott pulls him down, wrestling with him until Peeta spins around and lands another punch to his jaw.

Scott is in a daze for a moment which gives Peeta time to run over and help me up off the ground. He turns back to Scott and I watch in horror as I see Scott come flying off the ground, tackling Peeta to the floor. He puts him in a headlock. Peeta struggles for a second before he throws a fist up into Scott's face and elbows him in the stomach simutaneously.

Ignoring the pain, Scott scrambles out of the way and starts flying punches left and right, all of which Peeta evades. However, as Peeta is jumping out of the way at one point, Scott delivers a punch to his stomach that sends Peeta coughing and sprawling on the ground. Scott jumps on top of him but Peeta blocks his face with his arms as Scott tries repeatedly to get another punch in.

By now I jump up and try to pull Scott off of Peeta. I'm terrified that Peeta is going to get hurt when Scott lands a punch to Peeta's mouth. I see blood again and start shrieking, pulling harder at Scott's arms, trying my best to get him off, but he's so much heavier than me that it's barely doing anything. At one point, Scott isn't paying attention as much as he should be and Peeta lands another punch to Scott's face. Scott howls and clutches his eye. Peeta shoves him off of him and stands.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see a Peacekeeper running to us. I recognize him as the one that hangs out at the Hob, Darius. He's younger, with red hair, and much more leniant. Right now, though, he means business. Both Peeta and I get out of the way as he grabs Scott in his hands. By now he has blood smeared all over his nose and mouth and Peeta is bleeding from the cut on his lip, which is trickling down his chin by now. Both are breathing heavily. The Peacekeeper still has Scott in his hands, who keeps trying to break free to go after Peeta again. The peacekeeper straightens Scott out and forces him to stand still.

"What's going on here?" His eyes glance over all three of us. He pulls Scott up by his collar.

"What? They started it! They did! They both ganged up on me!" Scott is screaming and thrashing as he tries his best to get away from the Peacekeeper. "I didn't do anything!"

"I saw you throw the first punch. Fights are against the law in District Twelve." He yanks Scott's arms behind his back as Scott still continues thrashing and kicking. Darius holds him still for a moment and takes out a flashlight, shining it in Scott's eyes. His eyes narrow. "Are you on drugs?"

"No! They were fighting me too! Look at my face, Peeta did this! This isn't fair!" His words are all becoming jumbled together. His eyes, which were already glazed over to begin with, now can barely focus on anything. They're darting back and forth repeatedly.

"It was him, Darius." My voice comes out stronger than I expected it to. I walk over to where I kicked the knife and bring it back to the peacekeeper. I hand it to him. "He was threatening us with this. Peeta was just trying to protect us."

Darius looks at him questioningly. "Scott, you've been in trouble with us before, but a knife? Really?"

Scott starts screaming nonsense and Darius shakes his head. He's now incoherent and talking all kinds of crazy. Looking at him now it's easy to see that he can barely stand straight.

"I'm sorry, guys." He sighs and pulls Scott up again. "I'll take him away now. Normally if this was just a fight he'd just get a warning, but he's of age now, which means he'll be going to jail. He's obviously on some sort of drugs and he had a weapon. This will definately put him in for a while. I'm sorry this had to happen to you."

Both of us nod as Darius pulls him away towards town. We can still hear Scott screaming as they disapear into the horizon.

I examine Peeta from where I stand. His jaw has a red mark on it, but his lip is swollen and bleeding. His hair is a mess and his clothes are covered in dirt and speckled with blood.

Peeta watches me and slowly walks towards me. I bite my lip as I look up at his face. He pauses, and suddenly pulls me close into an embrace. His hands wrap around my waist, and his jaw rests on top of my forehead. "I'm sorry you had to see that, Katniss." He rubs my back. "Are you okay?"

I wince in pain, jerking myself out of his arms. His face falls as he sees my bloody hand and realizes I'm injured.

"Where? Where is it?"

I look up at him. He's close, the closest we have ever been. I can really see the blue stand out more in his eyes this close up, which are surrounded by thick golden eyelashes. My eyes flicker to his lips.

"I'm fine. Just a cut on my back. You, on the other hand, have a busted lip. Peeta, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault." I reach up, slowly so I don't pull my back too much, to smooth his hair out. I linger to brush a few curls off of his forehead. "If it wasn't for me, you never would have gotten in a fight." I step back.

"I'm fine. I just wish you didn't have to witness that. We can go back to my house and get cleaned up. I'm sure you don't want your family seeing you all banged up." Peeta grabs my hand as we walk back to his parents bakery. "Let me see your cut."

I shake my head and move away from him. "I'm fine. Don't worry about me." With every step I get a shooting pain down my back, but I try my best to hide it.

His face shows me that he doesn't believe me, but he lets it go for now. We walk towards his parents bakery a complete mess. I'm doing this weird walk trying not to strain my back and Peeta is covered in dirt and has blood all over his shirt. I'm surprised no one has spotted us and screamed; we probably look like zombies.

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><p>We finally approach his house and he opens the screen door for me. The house is empty and silent as we go up a staircase to the right of the door. I follow him as he goes to a door at the end of the hallway and opens it for me. I step in and look around.<p>

Theres a bed on one side of the room. It's sparse, with a simple blue blanket and a pillow. It's neat and tidy, unlike mine at home. On the other side of the room is a desk with a cup full of different pencils along with sketchpads and school books. The walls are empty except for a few drawings he has posted on them, and a window is slightly ajar on the opposite side of the room. A soft breeze billows in. I walk over to the bed and sit down at the edge, smoothing out the blanket. I fidget with the bottom of my shirt as I watch Peeta stand in the doorway awkwardly.

"I'll be right back. I'm going to go grab some first aid stuff real quick." He darts out of the door and I hear him in the next room loudly banging cupboard doors in search of items. Peeta reappears with cotton balls, a bottle filled with a clear liquid, a bowl of water, some towels, and some bandages. He sits next to me.

My eyes widen. "Do you know what you're doing?" He picks up a towel and soaks it in water. He smiles.

"I work in a bakery. We get burned all the time, so we know a few things about first aid." He motions for me to turn around. "Show me your back."

I hesitate. The cut stretches from just above my lower back to just underneath where my bra clasps along my spinal cord. I can feel a dull throbbing underneath my shirt as I wonder how to expose it without showing too much skin. Peeta is watching my face intently, waiting on me to show him my injury. I roll my eyes. There's really no way to avoid this.

I slowly begin pulling my shirt up and Peeta's eyes widen as his cheeks turn a deep shade of scarlett. His eyes look away and I turn around, my back facing him, as I pull my shirt up to just underneath my bra. I cover my stomach with his pillow and wait. I clutch it to me and I breathe in his scent. It smells sweet, like cake. Just like Peeta. I wait patiently.

He clears his throat. I feel him scoot a little bit closer to me on the bed. He brushes my braid off my back and over my shoulder, letting his hand linger along the skin where my neck meets my shoulder. I can feel the light flutter of his fingertips on my back as he inspects the cut. One hand is resting on my side as the other fingertips run down my back alongside the cut. His fingers on my side slightly shift and I shiver. The intimacy of this moment is not lost on me, and I'm sure it isn't lost on him either.

"I didn't realize you had it this bad." I turn to glance at him. "Your cut, I mean."

"It's not so bad. Just a little scratch."

"It's deep, Katniss. If it was any deeper it could have given you serious problems." His face is flooded with concern. "You're lucky."

"Because of you." My cheeks flush, but it's true. He goes back to focusing on my back.

I let my eyes linger on a framed scene on the wall over his bed. It's painting of a sunrise overlooking a field. The blue sky is illuminated over trees in the distance and the plants growing in the field glisten with morning dew. I smile. He's so talented, the way he can look at something and paint it so perfectly. This painting is absolutely gorgeous and is what he wakes up and goes to bed to every night. It's so peaceful. So beautiful.

Those thoughts are interrupted as I hiss in pain. The cut on my back stings with a white fire as I jerk out of the way of Peeta's hands, which makes me hiss again from stretching it from my movements. I yelp out in pain and breathe into the pillow, hiding my face in it until the pain subsides. I exhale slowly and turn around and give Peeta the meanest glare I can muster. He bites his lower lip in apology.

"I'm sorry. I should have warned you." I huff and roll my eyes.

"You think?

"I'm sorry."

I sigh. "It's okay. My mom does this stuff all the time. I just wasn't expecting it." My back is still facing him as I keep my head turned to study his face as he goes back to work. I see a few freckles, so light you almost can't see them, speckled across his nose. His blue eyes are intent on my back and his lips are relaxed. His bottom lip has the cut, which has stopped bleeding finally, but there is still some blood smeared on his face. His hair curls out a little at the back of his head, and meets with his broad shoulders which are covered in a dirty brown shirt. His eyes flicker up to mine, and I immediately look away.

I turn back to the wall as he continues working on me. He carefully touches the soaked cotton balls to my back until they come away clean. He spreads an ointment on it, first dabbing the cut and then rubbing it in gently. His finger runs along the length of the cut, spreading ointment on it methodically. He continues doing this for a long time when I turn back to look at him quizically. He seems in a trance as his eyes focus on his fingers and their movements. I chuckle and he sits up straight, his eyes focusing on the room around him.

"Sorry, I was spacing out."

I smile. He blushes again and throws the cotton balls away into a trash can next to his bed.

"Alright, all done. My turn." I turn around slowly and face him. "I'm going to need help with this lip." He does a pouty face, jutting his bottom lip out towards me. I laugh. I pick up a cotton ball. He picks up the bowl and takes the cotton ball from my hand, letting his fingers brush against mine. He dips it in the water and returns it to me.

"It's just water. It shouldn't hurt me. Go ahead." I look at him before I do anything. Our eyes meet and I take a long, slow, breath. I scoot closer to him on the bed as I lean forward, cupping his face gently in one hand. He watches my face for a few moments before relaxing and closing his eyes. I dab softly and meticulously at his lip. I gently run my thumb up and down his cheek as he smiles, his eyes still closed.

"Peeta, I want to thank you for what you did back there." His eyes flicker open and watch me. I stare into his eyes. We're even closer than we were earlier, when we shared that hug after the fight. We are merely inches away from each other now.

"I mean it. I'm sorry you got hurt, but I was so happy to have you there today to help me. I don't know what I would have done if you wouldn't have been there."

"I don't know what I would have done if something would have happened to you." My eyes search his and I'm at a loss for words. His eyes never leave mine as he continues on. "When I said I was going to protect you, I meant it. And I didn't say that because of everything that was going on with Scott. I meant it for always."

"Always?"

His hand draws up to cover the one holding his face. He closes his eyes again and he smiles.

"Always."

My eyes move again to his lips. I look up to see him watching me again, catching me in the act. His eyes flicker to my lips and his face goes still. He very slowly pushes a loose strand of hair behind my ear, letting his fingers linger for a moment on the side of my face. I feel my hand trembling and I'm confused, until I realize it's coming from his cheek, which my hand is still cupping. He shifts and my hand drifts to the back of his head, burying itself in his blonde hair. He gives a small, shy smile and his blonde eyelashes flutter closed for a moment as he slowly leans forward, inch by inch. I see his tongue flicker out to subconsciously wet his lips.

My heart is racing.

The next thing I know, his bedroom door bursts open and I hear screaming.

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><p><strong>So who do you all think it will be? What do you think will happen? This story isn't over yet, there's so much more to come! ;] <strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**To those of you who guessed Peeta's mom... dun dun dun... you were correct. :]**

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><p>"What do you think you're doing, Peeta? Just <em>what<em> do you think you're doing?" His mother is screeching at him at the top of her lungs. My body shrinks a little as her shrill voice fills my ears. "You must be more desperate than I thought." She turns around and sneers at me. "And you? What do you think _you're_ doing, making yourself at home in _my_ house? Who told you that was okay? You are _not_ welcome here." I'm in shock. I blink a few times, unresponsive, before she pulls me up and throws me out of Peeta's bedroom door which makes me stumble into the hallway. I brace myself against the wall to reel in the pain from my back. Peeta jumps up after me, but she blocks his way and shoves him back into the room roughly. "Get changed and go downstairs and help your brothers. You've done enough."

"Mother, please. Let me walk her home and I'll do whatever you want." His voice is pleading as he glances at me begging for forgiveness. He looks at his mom. "I'll work extra hours tonight, I'll wake up early to prep for you, I don't care."

"You stupid, stupid boy. If you think I'm going to let you walk this girl home to the Seam, you have another thing coming. It's filthy and you don't belong there. She does," she says as she turns to face me. She eyes me up and down. "Get on home. You'll see Peeta at school." I open my mouth to reply but nothing comes out. Before I get a chance to say anything, Peeta's voice fills the hallway.

"Mother, I've been walking her home for awhile now. You would know that if you payed more attention to something other than yourself." Peeta pushes his way past her into the hallway. He nudges me toward the staircase, but just before I turn away from him I see something flashing out of the corner of my eye. I turn back to them just in time to see his mom strike a hard blow across his face, sending him reeling into the wall. He stumbles, knocking over a picture frame hanging on the wall. The glass shatters to pieces and he is covering his face.

"_What_ did you just say to me? You idiot, all you care about is yourself. No one else in this house is as stupid as you. They all know their place. You're _nothing_, Peeta. If you disappeared, no one would care. You talk to me like that again and you'll get much worse, you fool." She turns to me and her lip curls up in disgust. She eyes me up and down and turns back to Peeta, who is slowly sinking to the floor. "You think she wants you? No one wants you. No one. You're lucky I let you live here. You're worthless. You're nothing to me." She shoves her way past us and goes downstairs. She flips her curly brown hair over her shoulders as she rounds the corner out of my line of view.

I stand in the middle of the hallway in shock for a moment until I realize Peeta still hasn't moved or said anything. I rush to him and sit in front of him on the floor where he is staring at the rug we are sitting on. I take his hand in mine and give it a squeeze to let him know I haven't left him. My heart breaks for my boy with the bread as I see just the beginnings of what he has endured for his entire life.

"I'm so sorry Peeta." I run my hands up his arms and place my hands on his shoulders as I pull him closer to me. I take his hands in mine as I hold them in my lap. I lean my forehead against his as I feel something wet fall on my hand. I look down and see a small drop of water on my palm. I glance back to Peeta's face and see a thin wet line from his eye to his jaw. He still hasn't said anything. I tilt his head up with my finger and face it towards me. He clenches his jaw and makes a point not to look me in the eye, staring away and at everything but me. "Peeta. Look at me, please." He says nothing. "Peeta?"

His eyes continue to stray from mine. I sigh. I brush his hair off his forehead, cradling his face in my hands. I brush his wet cheek dry with my thumb.

Through everything my family has been through my mother has never once said the kind of things Peeta's mother said, or laid a hand on me or Prim. Even when she was at her worst, she never came close. I knew Peeta's mother was bad, but never did I imagine that she was this bad. If she does these kind of things in front of me, I can only imagine how bad she is when no one else is watching.

Peeta is so much better than I am. So gentle. So sweet. So undeserving of this woman who calls herself his mother. I pull him forward so that his forehead rests against mine again. I then pull him against me, wrapping him in a hug. I bury my face in the crook of his neck and hold him close, breathing him in. He's incredibly still for a moment and doesn't move, doesn't breathe. I feel him exhale as his body relaxes and his hands slowly wrap around me as he buries his face in my hair.

The raw vulnerability of this moment is not lost on me, and I savor it. I know I'll hold on until he's ready to let go.

We sit there for a minute or so before he straightens and sits up. He looks at me and gives me a sad half-smile, still holding my hands. "Let's go." He stands and pulls me up with him.

"Watch your feet. There's broken glass everywhere." I look down. I took my shoes off in his room, and I'm barefoot. He sees this and steps toward me; his hands wrap around me. I look up at him, unsure of what he's doing, when he pulls me up into his arms. I wrap my arms around his neck as he carries me into his bedroom and sets me down next to the bed where my shoes are. He releases me gently and sighs.

"I'll be back. I need to clean that up." I watch as he leaves the room. I slip my shoes on and go to the doorway as I watch him fetch a broom and kneel down in the hallway. He scoops all of the glass into a trashcan and he's meticulous as he inspects the floor, making sure he didn't miss any shards, making sure his mother can't inadverdently hurt anyone else today.

A part of me knows that he has done this before. Other picture frames, or broken dishes, or something along those lines. It's obvious that his mother makes the messes and he's always the one left to clean it up afterwards. She hits him and hurts him with her words, leaves him a crumbling mess, and doesn't care about the repercussions. My jaw sets in anger as I know that Peeta is the last person on earth who deserves this.

"Alright, let's go." He nods toward the stairway. We walk downstairs and glance out the window to see it has now started raining. Peeta sighs loudly.

"This day just keeps getting better." Peeta groans, grabs an umbrella and we both step outside. We stand on the front porch for a moment, taking in our surroundings. The ground is muddy and the rain just keeps pouring and pouring. The sky is black. I groan inwardly. I absolutely loathe rain. We both take a deep breath, look at each other, and step into the abyss to get me home.

As we begin our walk to my house, I don't say anything. I know if Peeta wants to talk about what just happened, he'll talk. I'm not going to force him to say anything if he's not ready. I know he has to be incredibly embarassed and angry and sad all at the same time. I don't blame him for being quieter than usual. The sound of the rain falling on the umbrella is enough noise for us though. If we wanted to talk, we would have to be much louder than usual to hear each other's voices.

I'm not sure what exactly I would do if I were in his situation, but I know I would probably need some cheering up.

A light goes off in my head.

"You know what I hate? Rain. It gets everything wet, mud gets everywhere, and your hair and your clothes all get soaked. Worst of all, your shoes just get gross and drippy and then you have to walk and squish and smell like a wet stinky dog until you can get home to change. And forget letting it dry on it's own while you're still wearing it. Those things stay wet for hours upon hours! Which makes you smell bad even longer." Ugh. I shudder.

Peeta chuckles halfheatedly. "You don't smell like a wet dog, Katniss."

"But I feel like I do! You know what I hate more?" I widen my eyes and give him a goofy smile.

He laughs again. "I'm not sure. What do you hate more?"

"Dancing in public."

He bursts out laughing. "Well, you don't have to worry about that right now, do you?"

"Actually," I say as I grab the umbrella in his hand and toss it to the side, "I do." I take his hands and start jumping around dancing. The rain is pouring harder than ever. My clothes and hair is soaked within seconds, but I ignore it. He stands there staring at me with wide eyes, shaking his head, until I shake him into dancing with me. At first he's stiff and just kind of shakes his hips a little, but soon he's jumping around with me, both of us looking like complete idiots. We're both laughing so hard we can barely breathe.

As we're dancing, I feel weightless. None of the worries I woke up with today are tying me down anymore and I feel happier than I have in a long, long time. Peeta is laughing, and his eyes are lit up. His eyes meet mine and he stops and stands still. He smiles a huge grin at me as water runs down his face. His hair is wet and hangs a bit on his forehead, and I reach forward to brush it out of his eyes. As I pull my hand away, he takes it in his. He stops smiling and we both come to a stop.

He pulls me close. As I step forward he gives me a hug and then picks me up off the ground like he did to Prim a few weeks ago, but spins me around in circles. I give a small shriek and laugh. I wrap my arms around his neck and hold on for dear life until he slows down. He places me back down on the ground carefully.

We just stand there for a few moments and uncontrollably smile at each other. About thirty seconds pass as we both catch our breath. He is still standing close to me, his hands placed on my hips. My hands are still on his shoulders, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. He pulls me close again to give me another hug. This one isn't like the others, though. This isn't a hug of laughter and fun, this is a hug of vulnerability. This is a hug of tenderness. He holds me close. One hand is gently caressing the back of my head with his fingers woven through my hair, while the other is on the small of my back, being careful not to touch my injury.

"Thank you," he says into my hair. His hands run up and down my arms. "Thank you." He pulls back, giving me a small smile, and leans in. I close my eyes and I feel his lips as they kiss me on the forehead. I feel a slight feeling of disapointment, but I smile and return his gesture with a delicate kiss on the cheek. We arrive at my house shortly after, and he walks me to my front door. He gives me another hug and turns to leave again. He pauses. "Today could have ended really badly."

"But it didn't." I smile at him. "It'll be okay, Peeta. It will."

"I know. Thank you."

"Anytime."

Peeta leaves and I walk inside and strip off my wet clothes. I sniff them, and wrinkle my nose. I really do hate wet clothes. I know I was trying to cheer him up but I hate rain and dancing in public. Oddly, I didn't care at the moment. Those were the last things on my mind as we were dancing in the rain. All I wanted in that moment was to see him smile and not be sad anymore.

Our day today has changed something between Peeta and I. I honestly can't see myself going a day without talking to him. He makes me forget about all the things I worry about, yet makes me want to trust him with all my worries at the same time. Seeing him in pain, both physically and emotionally, make me want to do the same for him. I want to be someone he can trust. I just want to be _someone_ to him, not just a girl from the Seam.

Then my mind comes to a startling halt. I know nothing of love except for what I saw between my mother and father when I was a little girl. As beautiful as that was, I also saw how much it tore my mother up when he died. I saw the depression she fell into when she no longer had him by her side. To love someone like that only to have it ripped away from you... I'm not sure if i could handle that.

My heart quickens as I keep thinking about this. My mind begins racing in every different direction possible and doubts begin to settle in. After everything today I should want to be around Peeta as much as possible but now I'm more scared than ever. I honestly would not be able to handle losing anyone else in my life. I don't know if I can open myself up the way Peeta does with me. That's a level I have yet to hit, and maybe that's for the best. I don't need anyone else in my life that could bring more disapointment to me. I've lost one person. I don't need to lose another. I don't need to build up feelings that will betray me later on. I don't need more heartbreak.

I just need to distance myself from Peeta.

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><p><strong>Don't get too mad at me, everyone! You'll just have to wait and see what happens next and what she'll end up doing in the end. ;] But no worries, we're not at the end yet... there's more to come!<strong>


	11. Chapter 11

**SURPRISE! Two chapters in one week. I should still be updating on time again this weekend, don't worry. To everyone that has reviewed or has sent me private messages, I love you all. The end. :] Let's keep it up! Enjoy this chapter and you'll be hearing from me again soon!**

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><p>"Prim, stop jumping around, you look silly." Guilt settles in as soon as the words leave my mouth. I've been grumpy the last few days and I can tell I'm taking it out on Prim. She frowns and starts walking normally. She has no spring to her step like usual. Great, now not only am I a bad friend, but I'm a bad big sister too. I roll my eyes and sigh. "I'm sorry Prim. I'm just in a bad mood today."<p>

"I've noticed. I think it's because you miss Peeta."

My head snaps up as I look at her. "What did you just say?"

"I mean, he hasn't walked us home in a week and I think you got used to having him around. He's been hanging out with us for awhile now, and ever since he stopped walking us home you've been grumpy."

"What are you talking about? I have not." I purse my lips and cross my arms while we continue walking. Have I really been that obviously miserable without Peeta around? "I've been fine. I don't miss Peeta. I'm just in a bad mood today. I didn't get much sleep last night. And you're not helping things, either, little duck."

Prim giggles. "Don't get mad, Katniss. I really like Peeta. He's good at art and he's really nice. I think he's good for you." She smiles up at me. She skips ahead and starts walking backwards, facing me. "Don't you think?"

"I have other things I need to worry about other than Peeta." I stare straight ahead and avoid eye contact with her as we keep walking. She can always tell when I'm trying to hide something from her. I adjust my backpack.

She scoffs at me. "Like what, me and mom?" I raise my eyebrows and look at her. She rolls her eyes at me. "We're fine! You worry so much about everyone else that you forget you deserve to be happy too. Peeta brought you something special. He wanted to take care of you, and you never let anyone do that except for him. You always seemed so much happier when he was around." She grabs my hand. "Don't be scared of what could happen. Be scared of what you can lose."

"Little duck, you're way too smart for your years." I give her hand a squeeze and pull her into an embrace.

"I learn from the best." She starts bouncing around again.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." I shake my head and smile.

We arrive at school and separate ways in the courtyard. I open the double doors leading to my section of school as she leaves my field of vision. I chuckle. She's growing up so fast. It seems like yesterday that she was only five years old, skipping in our backyard. She still skips, but she's older now.

The hallways have been much more quiet since I've been avoiding Peeta. Maybe it's always been like this, and I never noticed. I look around and make a beeline for my locker. I'm searching for my History book when I feel a pair of eyes on me. I slowly turn my head.

I see Peeta walking down the hallway. He glances at me and smiles. My eyes widen as I turn back to my locker and bury my face inside. I roll my eyes. Really? I can't even look at him without freaking out now? I slam my locker door shut and walk to History class.

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><p>Later that day I walk into English. I can feel his eyes burning into me. Peeta turns away as I walk past him to my seat and sit down. I glance in his direction. He seems like he has something on his mind. He's sitting and staring at his notebook, not moving. His eyes are concentrated on one spot, not reading, just staring. He sighs.<p>

"Katniss! How is my beautiful best friend doing today?"

I hear a high pitched voice talking to me and see Madge coming to sit in her seat in front of me. I brighten up and smile. "Hey!"

"Well? Don't you have something to tell me?" She grabs me in a hug and grins at me. She goes to her seat and sits there for a moment, staring and expectant.

"I honestly have no idea what you're talking about, Madge. Do you know something I don't know?" She is giving me the goofiest grin I have ever seen. What is wrong with her? Why does she always act so wierd? Do I have something stuck in my teeth from lunch earlier? I rack my brain for news that I have that I haven't told her, but nothing comes to mind. Except for Scott, but the only person who knows about that is Peeta and he's not one to gossip.

"You don't have any new... developments lately?" She winks at me. "It's okay Katniss, I can keep a secret." She pokes me in my stomach. I flinch backwards and swat her hand away.

"What is wrong with you? What developments? You're not talking about Scott, are you?" I stare at her. I hate guessing games and I hate being poked in my stomach. I just want to know what she thinks she knows. Or doesn't know. Or something. What?

"Scott? What about Scott? I heard he got arrested last week. Are you talking to Scott too? I didn't know you had a thing for bad boys!" Her voice gets loud all of a sudden. "Katniss, you're a brave woman, talking to multiple boys at once!" She squeals and I wince. I shudder at the thought of Scott. Ugh.

"Shhhhhhh!" I look around and everyone is looking in our direction, including Peeta. I see hurt flash across his face, and his cheeks turn pink as he faces the front of the class again. "Nothing is going on with Scott. And keep your voice down, Madge. It's not everyone's business to know all of my personal business."

"Oops." She shrugs her shoulders and gives me a sheepish smile. "Sorry, I get carried away sometimes. But seriously. I can't believe you didn't tell me anything."

I groan. "No, Madge. There's nothing to tell. Scott was harassing me for a bit but it's all over now. _Who_ are you talking about, multiple boys? And _what_ are you talking about, _talking to multiple boys_? What is wrong with you? You're so wierd," I whisper as I gently smack her upside her head. She shakes it and smiles.

Her voice comes out as a mere whisper. She ducks her head close to mine as she speaks in my ear. "There's a rumor going about about you and Peeta Mellark? That he's been walking you home from school and you two are dating? I know I saw you at the market and all, but I guess I figured I was imagining things. But you did blow me off to leave with him." She stares at me and raises one eyebrow. "Unless the rumors aren't true."

I glare at Madge. What do I tell her? _Yes, Madge, Peeta had been walking me home from school but we're not dating. I think we had a few moments here and there and I think I was having feelings but now I'm avoiding him because I don't want to ever get married or get heartbroken, but hey, it's cool._ "No, Madge, we are not dating."

"I mean, it's okay if you are. You know that, right? He's so adorable and sweet and nice. And he is _buff_. You know he lifts 100 pound bags of flour right? He has great arms. And a really nice butt."

"Madge!" I laugh as my eyes widen at her. She really doesn't know how to filter her words sometimes.

"What? Don't get mad at me for noticing these things. Seriously, tell me you didn't notice that butt! It. is. _so_... perky."

"Oh dear God. Madge, stop it." I bury my face in my hands and shake my head. My cheeks are flaming.

"Just saying."

"Honestly, he's is a great guy. He is. I care about him alot. I'm just don't want to date. All that happens is people get heartbroken and I don't need that. And you need to mind your own business, Madge. It's personal and I don't need more rumors going around."

"So you like him?" She ignores my comment and giggles and grabs my hand. "Katniss! You have to date him. He'd be perfect for you! And he is always looking at you. _Always. _Since we were all little kids, he is always looking at you. He has it bad, I'd bet a ton of money."

"Seriously Madge, no."

"Katniss, it's okay to have feelings for someone and admit it. Don't be scared."

"I'm not."

"So you say."

My jaw sets and I stare at her. "I'm not afraid. And don't go around telling this conversation to anyone!" I glare at her. "Or I'll hunt you down."

"Alright, fine, I'll let it go. But think about it. I think it could be a good thing, Katniss. You two would balance each other out perfectly."

"Madge."

"Okay, okay." She turns around in her seat and huffs.

My eyes flicker to Peeta again. He's still facing forward, hunched over his desk, his pencil moving rapidly over his notepad. Probably drawing. If I'm being completely honest, Prim and Madge are right. I miss Peeta. I miss having his company, seeing his drawings, laughing, and giggling, and Lord help me, I also miss his hugs. I miss him, period. But I can't. I just can't.

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><p>"Did I do something wrong? Are you avoiding me?" Peeta is walking next to me as I leave English class. He looks genuinely hurt. Granted, I've been trying my hardest to distance myself, running out of class and darting in the other direction if I saw him coming. I was succeeding until he caught up with me today. My heartbeat raises as I seach for an answer.<p>

"No. Why do you say that?" I look away as I say the words, biting my lip. I can't lie to him. Not to Peeta. He always knows when something is up, and I guarantee that he knows that now.

I can feel his eyes burning into me as he watches me for a second. "It seems like you've been avoiding me ever since that day in the rain." Of course he wouldnt mention the fight or his mother. Just the rain. Every time I think of that day, it's what I think of, too. The rain. Of both of us letting loose for the first time ever, together, and forgetting everything this world has tried to dump on us. Just me and him. Just us together. Happy.

"I've just been really busy. I've had a lot of school work. Sorry." I stare at the ground. Saying the words, even I can hear that they sound pathetic. I groan inwardly. I shift my weight from one foot to the other.

"I miss you." I look up at this when I hear something in his voice. His eyebrows are knitted together as he watches me. His eyes are full of question and doubt, and most of all, hurt. Of course they are; I went from dancing in the rain with him to ignoring him completely. I'm terrible.

"I know. I just... I can't." I shake my head. "I'm sorry."

"You can't what? Be friends? Spend time with me?"

"Anything." It comes out sounding so mean. So hurtful. As soon as I say the words I see his face fall. As soon as I say the words, I feel my heart break into a million pieces. I have to be honest with him, though. I can't string him along and break his heart anymore than I can string myself along. I know this can't be anything. Tears fill my eyes and I look away, trying to avoid Peeta's face. I can't breathe. Peeta nods. He bites his lip and stares at the floor.

"I'm sorry too." He looks up at me and slowly reaches into his pocket. He pulls out a tiny black velvet bag. "I got this for you last week." My eyes flicker to his in confusion. What did he get me? I tentatively hold out my hand and he drops the bag into my fingertips. "I hope you like it."

He walks away as I open the bag. I reach in and pull out the small stone from the market last week, the one that looks like a pearl. The tears that threatened to fall earlier now begin running down my cheeks as I watch him walk down the hallway. As he walks away he takes my breaking heart with him. I want to run to him and tell him I'm sorry, but I know it's best if I don't. Both of us will just end up getting hurt.

I roll the stone between my fingertips, feeling the cold smooth surface of it. I reach up to wipe away the tears and tuck the stone back into the bag and into my pocket, keeping it safe. This gift from him is precious and I'll hold it dear to me forever. I fight every urge right now to run after him and throw my arms around him, begging forgiveness, but I can't. I won't. I know this is best.

I just wish I knew it was going to be this hard to stay away from him.


	12. Chapter 12

The last month has been unbearable.

Ever since I told Peeta we can't be friends anymore it's like a ghost town. I never see him anymore- not at school, other than occasional glances in class, or on the way home. Occasionally I'll see him at the bakery when I go to trade, but as soon as I walk inside he gives me a short nod, leaves the room, and someone else comes in to talk to me. I know it's my fault, and I know that I hurt him, but I never thought it would be like this. I never thought I would miss him this much. I don't know what I thought would happen after I told him we couldn't be friends; it's not like I wanted him to beg me to change my mind, but the last thing I thought was that he'd go out of his way to avoid me.

It's what I asked for, though. It's my fault.

Prim has stopped asking about Peeta. Madge still asks about him occasionally but usually gives up after I just stare at her for a few minutes. Meanwhile, he is always in my thoughts. Always. I see a sunset and I think of his drawings. I see Prim smile at me and I think of her squealing as he picked her up in a hug. I see thunder clouds rolling in and I think of us dancing in the rain. I know this is the right thing to do though. This hurts now, but being with him and getting ripped away from him would be even worse. Knowing what it felt like to be with him to never be able to have it again would be terrible. These thoughts just keep pounding through my head every time I have the urge to talk to him again.

I've been keeping busy with school and doing things around the house to help Mom and Prim. I built a pen for Prim's goat, I fixed up a leak in the ceiling for Mom. When I can't find anything to do I hang out with Madge in town or I go outside the fence by myself to think alone. I don't mind being alone. I'm comfortable with it.

Today I am going hunting, and hopefully it will get my mind off of things. I sit on the floor at the front door and put on my boots and leave. As I get to the fence closing District 12 off from the rest of the world, I pause to see if I hear the buzzing that means the electricity is on. When I hear nothing, I crawl under it and quickly trudge through the forest. I find the places where I hide my bow and arrow and keep trecking through the woods, finding a place to sit and wait.

Hunting is my one escape from everything. Out here, I don't have to impress anyone or use words to get what I want. It's me, nature, and my bow. It's my home. When I was a little girl, my father taught me how to hunt. He showed me how to walk without being heard, how to stay completely still when waiting for my prey, how to shoot so that it pierced perfectly without ruining the meat. He showed me patience. He showed me everything I know.

I remember the day my family found out about the mining explosion. It was like my entire body went numb. I couldn't think, I couldn't move, I couldn't function. My mom to this day has never fully recovered from the shock of losing our rock of the family. He was our protector in every sense of the word and I adored him. I remember nights when he would come home and sit on his chair and I would crawl in his lap while he sang to me. My sister would usually sit at his feet and my mother would sit across the room and smile as she watched us. Those are the nights I remember most. Just sitting and being with him.

One of my last memories of him is from a few days before the mining explosion.

_I carry my bow and arrow as my father guides me through the woods to hunt. "Dad, this boy at school is always looking at me wierd."_

_"Is he now? What's his name?" _

_"Peeta Mellark." I moan and throw my hands up in the air. "I don't know why he always looks at me. He's just there. I tried to talk to him once and he just stared at me and started blushing. He's so weird!"_

_My father chuckles. "Maybe he wants to be your friend, sweetheart. He sounds like he's shy. Give him a chance." He nudges me forward so that I can walk in front of him. I step through the brush quietly, stepping over twigs and branches in the way so that the noise doesn't echo through the woods. "New friends are a good thing."_

_"I don't want to be friends with a boy! They're stupid." I shake my head profusely and stick my tongue out. "Nuh uh."_

_"Sure, you say that now. You just wait, give it a few years. It'll surprise you out of nowhere."_

_"Nope. I'm never going to see a boy like that."_

_"Katniss, love, you are going to grow up one day and fall in love. It'll be scary, but it's the most beautiful feeling in the world," he says as we sit down quietly behind a large tree that has fallen. He arranges us so that he sits directly behind me, his back to the wilderness behind us, protecting me from anything that should come. I breathe him in. He smells of pine and wood._

_"Love? That's never going to happen to me. I'll never fall in love." I shudder as I consider it. The thought of it made me feel gross. Boys? No. No thanks._

_"But you will. And you can't be afraid of it, Katniss. You have to learn to let yourself love and let yourself be open to others. You are a beautiful young woman and one day someone will make you very happy." He smiles at me and ruffled my hair. "Love is precious. Never take it for granted."_

_"Like you love mom?"_

_"Like I love mom." _

Such a short conversation, but it made a huge impact on me. Don't take love for granted? My mother did, and look where it got her. She loved my father so much she thought he'd be there forever. And he wasn't. When he was ripped away from us, he took a part of her with him. I don't think she'll ever find another person who will make her as happy as my father did.

I don't know what to believe anymore. I keep going back and forth and back and forth. Maybe I could keep Peeta as a friend. Maybe I can have a strictly platonic relationship with him and not want anything more. Maybe. All I know is that every day I don't talk to him is another day of sadness for me. He wasn't just my friend; he was a best friend. I have never had feelings for anyone before him. I don't know anything about this, about feelings, about love. It's not like we ever said we had feelings for each other, but there was an unspoken bond between us. The way he looked at me, they way he hugged me, the way he kissed my forehead... Ugh. I groan.

I can't.

I can't do this. I can't hunt today. I'm not even paying attention.

Damn Peeta.

Damn him distracting me every second of every day. There's no way I'll be able to actually get something done when I can't even concentrate on anything around me. I pick up my things and start walking back to the fence, hiding my bow and arrow again on the way there. As I get closer, I hear no buzzing and crawl under it and make my way back to the house.

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><p>"Katniss, are you hungry?" Mother is at the stove heating up some stew she bought from the market. She turns and gives me a smile.<p>

"No." I drop my things at the door and loudly pull back a chair in the kitchen. I begin unlacing my boots as she watches me.

"Are you okay?" She pulls out a chair and sits beside me at the table, wiping her hands on a towel. "You've seemed a little distracted lately." She leans forward and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. I frown and shake my head, letting it fall against my face again.

"Yepp." I focus on my boots, not looking at her. I pick them up and toss them at my pile at the front door, all of which collapses and creates a big mess. I roll my eyes and sigh, ignoring it for now. I stand up go to the cupboard to pull out a tall glass. I fill it with water and chug it all down within seconds.

"You know I'm always here to talk." I feel a hand on my shoulder. I roll my eyes and glance at her over my shoulder. She's giving me a look of concern, her eyebrows knitted together, giving me a heartfelt smile. She's having a good day today, it seems like. She usually doesn't try this hard. It doesn't affect my mood, however.

"Yepp." I walk away and go to the bedroom to sit on my bed. I feel something brush against my feet and look down. Buttercup is sitting at my feet. He hisses at me and paws at my leg. I try to nudge him away with my foot and he bites my toe, hissing again. I resist the urge to kick him across the room, but barely. I lay down on the bed and stare at the cieling. I grab a pillow and hold it to my chest, clutching it close to me.

Stupid cat.

Stupid furball.

Stupid boys.

"Stupid boys?"

I look up and see my mom standing in front of me. Did I say that outloud? Crap. This is exactly what I need, my mother asking questions about my life. Great.

"It's nothing." I look down at my shirt and see a piece of dirt stuck to it. I pick it off and smooth my top out.

"What boy are you talking about?" She sits next to me on the bed. "Is that why you've been in a grumpy mood lately?"

"I'm not grumpy," I huff out as I turn away from her. "I'm just tired."

"You're tired."

"Yepp," I say sarcastically. I bury my face in my pillow.

"Then why are boys making you talk to yourself?" She nudges me. "You can talk to me. Just us two. I promise."

I turn and look at her. She's never done this before. The whole sitting down and talking to me, to listen, to help. Who else can I talk to? Madge? Prim? No. I might as well. Before I can second guess myself, everything comes tumbling out of my mouth all at once.

"There's this boy and his name is Peeta and he walked me and Prim home every day from school for a bit because Scott was harassing me and Peeta was really nice and at first I thought he was faking it because there's no way anyone could be like that but he was actually really kind of perfect and then Scott got in a fight with Peeta and got arrested and then Peeta's mom hit him and then we danced in the rain and then I got scared and told him we couldn't be friends anymore and now I miss him alot but I know we can't be friends because I can't have feelings for anyone."

I take a deep breath and look at my mom, who has a look of pure horror on her face.

"Wait, he got arrested? You don't need to date anyone who got arrested."

_Is that all she just got from that? Typical mother._ "No, Scott got arrested. Peeta was protecting me."

"And you have feelings for Peeta."

"I don't have feelings for him. I never said I have feelings for him. I said I can't _have_ feelings for _anyone_," I say, eyebrows raised.

She chuckles until she sees my angry face staring at her. She clears her throat. "Okay... I still don't understand why you can't _have_ feelings for someone. It's not so bad."

_She really doesn't understand! Why can't she understand? _"Because, loving only hurts people. Feelings only make people act crazy and then heartbroken when it gets ripped away."

"Who gets heartbroken? It's better to love and have lost than to have never loved at all. Don't turn away from someone just because you're scared." She puts her hand on my shoulder and shakes her head. "I understand where you're coming from, and that's completely natural, but that kind of fear is going to hold you back in life, sweetheart."

I throw my hands up in the air and my pillow goes flying, somehow smacking me right in the face. I groan loudly. "_Argh! _Why does everyone keep saying that I'm scared? I'm not scared! I'm trying to be smart!" I dig my fingernails into the pillow in frustration. Angry tears form in my eyes and I blink them away. No more tears. I refure to shed tears anymore over this.

"Honey, running away from something isn't being smart. You don't know if it will last or not. Look at your father and I. We were so happy together."

"_But you lost Dad_," I say angrily.

It's silent for a moment before I realize what I said. I turn to look at her and I see tears in her eyes. I sigh. I'm such a jerk. "I'm so sorry, mom. I didn't mean it like that. I just saw how much it tore you up when you lost him. I don't want that to happen to me, is all. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

We're both quiet for a few minutes. I watch her as she thinks for a few more moments. A tear runs down her cheek and she lets out a long, slow breath. She wipes her eyes, and takes a deep breath.

"It's okay, honey. I know." She sniffles again. "Like I said, it's better to love in the end. Yes, I lost your father, but I had all that time with him, all those years. I would never trade those precious moments for anything. I got you, and Prim, and so much more that I can't be thankful enough for. Sometimes things don't work out, but at least you know, and you've felt those feelings. You can't go through life without knowing what it's all about. And life is about loving."

"You don't regret it at all?"

"Not a single minute. I would go through it all over again in a heartbeat if I had to choose whether or not I got that time with him." A tear runs down her cheek and she pulls me close. I wrap my arms around her as tears well up in my eyes. "He loved you, you know." She smoothes my hair out and kisses my forehead. "He loved all of us so much."

"I miss him so much, Mom," I whisper as tears run down my face. She runs her fingers through my hair, wipes my cheeks with her thumb. She rests her chin against my head and breathes in. She lets out a loud sigh.

"I know, honey. I do too. We all do." She straightens me up and holds my shoulders, staring at me seriously. "If he was here, he'd tell you to go for it. Don't let something hold you back. You lost your father, yes. But let me ask you this: if you had a choice, what would you do? Never feel the pain, never meet him, never have that time with him? Or go through it all again just because you loved him so much and valued every second you got with him?"

I let those words sink in. It's an easy choice. "I'd go through it all again." I sigh. "But that's different, mom. He was my dad. I loved him from the beginning. I didn't have a choice."

"Is it so different?"

I don't answer.

She nods and stands up. "Alright, sweetheart. Get some rest. You have school tomorrow. Just think about what I said though. Don't let something good slip away, honey. Goodnight." She stands in the doorway for a moment, watching me. She smiles. "I love you."

Tears well up in my eyes again. I haven't heard her say those words in a long time. I smile. "I love you too, mom. Goodnight." She closes the door.

My heart is uneasy. Now I'm more confused than ever. I know that what she has said tonight is true. Have I been saying all these things to convince myself to walk away just because I was afraid of what Peeta and I can have? Am I really that crazy, that self destructive and afraid?

I just don't know anymore.

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><p><strong>Hey everyone! So, good news and bad news: for the next week and a half I'll be updating much more often, like every other day or two. Yay! Bad news- long story short, I have a wedding to plan! My mom is coming into town from Japan to help me and I haven't seen her in over two years since I've been in college here in the US. I'll be really busy, but I'll make sure to keep updating; I'll try to update weekly but I can't guarantee it. I'm so excited! I love you all and I hope you liked this chapter! :]<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

I am utterly exhausted.

Last night I got no sleep at all. All night I just stayed up and thought about what my Mom had said and what my Dad had told me so many years ago. As I layed in bed the thoughts kept pouring in, rolling like thunder, and I was helpless to stop them. Nothing makes sense to me anymore. On the way to school this morning, I barely say anything to Prim. I stay quiet and concentrate on the path in front of us.

"Is everything alright, Katniss?" Prim watches me. She takes my hand in hers and gives it a squeeze. "You look so tired today," she says quietly.

"I haven't been sleeping well," I say as I look down at her. I take in a long breath of air and let it out slowly. "I'm just really exhausted is all." I stare ahead. "Don't worry about me, Prim. I'll be okay. Nothing a good night of sleep won't fix." It's quiet for a moment and neither of us say anything. She looks up at me and gives another small smile with sadness in her eyes.

"Someone has to worry about you," she whispers.

I walk through all of my classes today like a robot going from class to class without giving mind to anything around me. I can't pay attention, my eyes can't stay focused and I keep drifting off to sleep. I am emotionally and physically exhausted. During one class I prop my head against my wrist and I fall asleep only for my hand to slip out of place which sends my upper body crashing to one side. I wake up and the whole class is giggling at me.

What a lovely day this is.

* * *

><p>I walk into English class and sit down. I stare straight ahead, not really focusing on anything in particular. My eyes flicker back and forth from student to student as they trickle in to sit at their seats. I keep reminding myself that I just need to get through this class so I can go home and be alone. I sigh and look out the window. I see two birds flying together and weaving around and about each other, coasting on the gusts of wind. They fly onto a branch near the window and sit next to each other. I smile and close my eyes, resting my head on the desk. I hear someone greet me, but I ignore them. I'm not in the mood to talk today. I let everything else drift away and soon I find myself falling asleep.<p>

_My father is standing right in front of me. We are standing in an open clearing in the middle of the woods. The trees are thriving and green and luscious, and the sun is peeking out through the trees. He smiles and steps closer to embrace me in a hug. "Don't be afraid, Katniss; don't be afraid." He kisses my forehead. He steps out of my line of view and disappears. I blink and my surroundings change._

_Peeta and I are now walking hand in hand down a road; his hands fit mine perfectly, and as we walk we are perfectly in sync. It's breathtakingly beautiful outside as the sun is shining and warms me from the inside out. A breeze is softly billowing through my hair which is cascading around my shoulders in soft waves. I'm wearing a white sundress, light and airy and flowy. I feel weightless and ethereal. I look at Peeta and his hair is a bit unkempt as usual. His skin is tanned and glowing and healthy and he wears a white shirt and a pair of tan shorts. I can smell the pine trees in the distance and the faint floral scent of flowers that line the path we are walking._

_Peeta pulls us to a stop and we face each other. He smiles, a bright radiant smile, and picks me up in a hug spinning me around in circles like our day in the rain. I giggle and wrap my arms around his neck, holding on for dear life. My fingers gently entertwine with his hair. His strong arms gently set me down and I breathe him in, not letting go of his neck. He smells like sugar and cinnamon; the sweetness of the bakery still lingers on his skin. He buries his face in my hair, nuzzling me, and lays a soft kiss on my neck. I shiver._

_Now we're spinning around again and falling down onto the grass, laughing and giggling like school children. I land with my upper body on top of his and his hands rest on my waist. I close my eyes as Peeta pulls me closer. I rest my head on his chest, resting one hand on his abdomen. He wraps one arm around me and takes my hand in his. We lay there for awhile, not speaking, just enjoying the other's presence, enjoying the moment._

_I smile to myself. This moment, right now, could not be any more perfect. _

_Peeta touches my chin and my eyes flicker to his. He gently lifts my chin to face him. His blue eyes, framed in thick blonde eyelashes, are focused on mine. They flicker down to my mouth and instinctually I do the same. He pulls me closer, resting his forehead against mine. He then draws back and places a soft kiss on my forehead, barely touching his lips to my skin. He brushes his lips over my eyelids, then my nose, then my cheek. I can feel myself involuntarily begin to shake. _

_He pulls back and pauses, questioning, and I nod at him just barely. I can't breathe. He is slowly leaning in, his lips like feathers, touching mine so softly that I'm not even sure he did it or if I just imagined the feel of his lips brushing against mine. Butterflies fill my stomach, floating up and down and in circles. He pulls back again to see me smiling. He shyly smiles and leans back in again. _

_This kiss isn't like the other. His hand is at the base of my neck, cradling it, while the other is softly caressing my cheek. I feel his lips touch mine again, but this time he is unafraid. This time his lips press down, still tender like before, but they press feverently against mine with a sweet passion that makes me forget about everything but the way his mouth feels on mine. I feel my body turn into jelly when he runs his fingers through my hair and a rush flows through my lips all the way down to my toes, igniting a fire within. _

_His lips are soft and his hand is warm as it slowly trails down my arm; his fingers trace a path back down to take my hand in his. He weaves his fingers with mine, curling them together to his chest. The hand cradling my head pulls me even closer, deepening the kiss. I feel myself sigh as his lips venture to my neck, softly leaving a trail of kisses down to my collarbone and back up to my lips again. _

_I was wrong. This moment is definately perfect now._

_Peeta parts his lips against mine and I react accordingly, mimicing his actions. I feel his tongue lightly brush against my bottom lip as I hear a voice calling my name._

_"Katniss, I just asked you a question. Katniss?"_

I open my eyes and feel everyone's eyes in the room burning into me. I sit up and blink a few times before I realize the teacher is still talking to me. Why is she still talking? I just want to go back to that dream, that perfect and wonderful-

It was a dream. Only a dream.

I take in a sharp breath and look at Peeta only to see him give me a sad smile. Before I know it I feel tears in my eyes and I can tell they're dangerously close to spilling over. I'm standing up out of my seat desperate to get out of the room. I need to get out of here before the entire class sees me cry; I can't let them all see me cry. I walk toward the classroom door.

"Katniss! Sit down, I'm trying to talk to you!" Mrs. Neppencourt steps in my line of view when she sees the tears threatening to spill down my face. I'm right in front of Peeta's seat and I try to turn my head so he can't see my face but before I do a tear escapes down my cheek. I wipe it away quickly but not fast enough. I look down and see his face harden in concern. His head slightly tilts to the side, unsure of how to react. I look away and take deep breaths to calm myself down. I lock eyes with my teacher.

"_Please_."

Mrs. Neppencourt's eyes flicker hesitantly from me to the door. She sighs and her eyes soften. "Go, Katniss. You're excused." She steps away as I run to the door, letting it slam behind me.

As soon as I step into the hallway my emotions spill out of me, avalanching out of control. Tears spill over and refuse to stop. My heartbeat is going a million miles a minute, I'm shaking uncontrollably and I can't breath. I'm literally gasping for air, and it doesn't matter how deep or shallow my breaths are; I can't breathe. I feel a weight on my chest as if someone is sitting on me. I feel sick to my stomach. I look around and realize anyone could walk by and see me like this so I make my way to the girl's bathroom and lock the door.

I stand in front of the mirror. My eyes are red and puffy and my cheeks are flushed. I look down at my hands and they are visibly shaking. I see a chair in the corner of the room and sit down, hunched over, putting my head in between my knees. I force myself to get a grip. _What's wrong with me?_ I focus on taking steady, long, deep breaths. After a long time I can feel my heartbeat returning to a normal pattern. My body stops tremoring and I lean back to rest my head on the wall behind me.I grab a few paper towels and put water on them before holding them against my eyes to get rid of the redness.

I think I have just had my first panic attack. I've heard of them- my mother has patients visit in the middle of one feeling as if they're going to die. Most think they're having a heart attack due to the racing heart and shortness of breath. She usually just sits them down and gives them a paper bag to breath in and out of until they calm down. It can take anywhere from ten minutes to hours to get them to relax again. Luckily, mine didn't last long.

A panic attack.

All because of a dream.

That dream was heartbreaking. First I see my father, the one man I would give anything to see again. Then Peeta. When I woke up, I finally realized how much I truly care about Peeta. Finally. I finally see that walking away from him wasn't just hurting him but it hurt me as well. What have I done? I told the one person I needed in my life that I couldn't even be his friend. And then when he gave me that sad smile I realized that I haven't gotten a smile from him in a long time. I've ruined all chances of ever having that when I stopped talking to him. How could I have been so stupid? How could I walk away from the one person I ever let myself open up to? I'm an idiot.

I could live a thousand lifetimes and still not deserve him.

My mind flickers back to how it felt in the dream. It was so real; I touch my fingers to my lips and remember the warmth I felt when his lips brushed against mine. God, that kiss was perfect. I have to keep reminding myself that it wasn't real, it was just a dream. I remember the butterflies I felt in my stomach and the way I felt so right in his arms as his fingers were woven into mine, held against his chest. I remember the sweetness and tenderness of the moment and how Peeta was so gentle, yet so filled with that fire. I wonder how it would be in real life; I guess I'll never find out.

I'm so stupid, so incredibly stupid.

I collect myself as I take a deep breath. I hear the bell ringing letting us know it's time for us to go to go home. I burst open the door ready to make a run for it when I feel myself trip into someone blocking the door entrance. A pair of strong arms catch me, and when I look up I am face to face with Peeta.


	14. Chapter 14

I stumble forward and clutch Peeta's arms in shock for a moment before releasing them. I stand up straight to collect myself and brush a few loose strands of hair out of my face. I look up at him again and he is staring at me intently, with a look of concern in his eyes. His gaze softens. He speaks to me quietly.

"Are you okay? I saw you crying in class." His eyebrows knit together in worry. He stares at me and then his eyes flicker back and forth between the two of us; he stands back a few steps when he realizes how close we are. He crosses his arms and watches me awkwardly. Looking down the hallway and back to me, he looks as if he's trying to plan a route of escape if needed. My fault, of course. Because of me he just can't get away from me fast enough.

"It's okay. I'm okay. I just... had a bad dream is all." I look into his eyes and hold his gaze. It would be so simple to just come out and say it._ I miss you, Peeta. I'm sorry. I was wrong. _But I'm stubborn and always have been. Besides, I'm probably not in the emotional state to have that conversation right now. He probably hates me now anyways. Then I realize-

I'm still staring into his eyes. I look down at the floor as his gaze stays steady on me.

"Your father?"

My head snaps up. My words come out as a whisper as I glance down, shifting my weight from one foot to the other. "More or less." It's true, at least. I'm not lying. He was in my dream, if only for a moment. Peeta doesn't have to know that the majority of it was about him.

He takes a small step closer and lowers his voice. "Do you want to talk about it?" I look up at him again and get lost in his eyes. He's always had beautiful blue eyes. They show a world of emotions with just a single look. Up close I can see flecks of different shades of blue in them. My eyes go down to his lips and I remember the dream. My cheeks flush.

I don't deserve him at all. I never will.

"No, Peeta, I'm fine. Promise. I'm just really tired and exhausted and I had a bad dream in class," I say as I run a hand through my hair. "My emotions have been all out of whack lately and I guess it's caught up to me. I haven't been sleeping the last month or so." My body freezes. Did I reveal too much? I look up at him and his eyes are sad as they focus on me. He bites his lip and looks away.

His voice is a whisper. "I know how that feels." His words pierce through me with their implications. He doesn't say anything else. This is the first time I've been able to really look at him in a while, and I take advantage of the moment. His hair is messier than usual and his eyes look tired. His skin doesn't have the usual glow that it used to have. He looks exhausted just like I feel. I'm such I look like it too.

The effect of us being apart is obviously wearing on both of us.

"I'm sorry, Peeta. I never meant for this to happen. I never meant to be a burden-"

"You never burdened me Katniss," he interrupts. He seems frustrated with me, understandably. "I just overstayed my company. I get it." He shrugs and turns to walk away. He stops and glances back. "See you later." He turns his back and starts down toward his locker on the other end of the hallway. I watch him and my hands are twitching, nervous. I take deep breaths. I call out to him.

"Peeta, wait." I rush to catch up to him as he stops, but he doesn't turn around. I stand there for a moment waiting but he doesn't move. His back is still to me as I take his hand and pull it so he faces me. His eyes stare at the ceiling, the floor, everywhere but me. He blinks a few times and bites his lip, still avoiding my gaze. "Please." I give his hand a slight squeeze and his eyes flicker to mine. I see a moment of anger, then a softness in his eyes that I used to see all the time. Then his face hardens and he looks angry again.

"Please what?"

Confused, I tilt my head. "What?" I'm taken aback for a second.

"You said, 'Please.' Please what?"

"I... I don't understand..."

"Last time we talked you said we couldn't even be friends, and now you're standing here looking at me like that and holding my hand again and I don't know what you want from me. We can't be friends. We can't talk. We can't be 'anything,' " he says, making quotation mark gestures with his fingers. "And now you're standing here with me pleading for I don't even know what. What do you want from me?"

Peeta waits patiently as I stare at him. He waits for a long time, but I never say anything. My mouth is hanging open just a little and I'm speechless; I know I deserve everything he's saying, but I don't know how to respond. I don't know how to say the words I want to say. I've never been good with words. He sighs and steps backwards away from me and lets go of my hand. "I've got to go, Katniss."

I don't reply as I watch him walk away from me. _Come back to me. Just come back and wrap me in one of your bear hugs and be my friend again. I'm sorry. _I shake my head. I'm talking to him in my head. That'll do no good. But I can't talk about this at school. I need to talk to him when no one is around; I need to really talk to him, and explain everything. Maybe then he'll understand. Maybe then he won't hate me.

My mind is made up. Operation Get Peeta Back is now officially in motion.

* * *

><p><strong>Short chapter, I know, I know. I'll be posting the next one up very soon! What do you think Katniss should do to get Peeta to start talking to her again? Do you think it's possible? Has she pushed him too far away or is their relationship salvagable? Until next time, my loves! :]<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

"Katniss! Smile!" Prim groans at me after school. We're taking our usual path home and the sun is beating down on us. It's much hotter than usual, which isn't helping my mood. I huff out a breath of air and wipe a sheen of sweat off of my forehead. "You're so boring and moody lately. I miss my big sister." She grabs my hand and shakes it trying to get me to focus on our conversation. I glance down at her in irritation pulling away from her sticky hands. Apparently I'm not the only one who's sweaty. "Don't get me wrong, I love you and all, but it's been too long. What's going on? Please tell me! And don't lie to me, I'm not just a little kid anymore. Maybe I can help."

"Prim, seriously. Give me some space. Not today, alright?"_ I have enough to worry about without you harping at me, little duck. _

"Why not today, Katniss? What happened? _Just talk to me_. Who else are you going to talk to? You can trust me; I'm worried about you."

"I know I can trust you, little duck, but you don't need to know everything about me. Some things are better left unsaid."

"If it's something to do with Peeta I can help. I've spent a lot of time with him, more than other people at school except for you. More than mom, more than Madge."

I groan. _I swear, she's psychic. _"I just messed up, that's all." I've piqued her interest. She narrows her eyes at me and tilts her head at me as we walk.

"Messed up how?" My eyes roll. I stare up at the sky as I think about whether or not to tell her what happened between Peeta and I. The less she knows, the better. I fan my shirt a little to cool myself off more.

"It's a long story, but he's not talking to me."

"Why?"

"I pushed him away." I wait for a reply, but Prim is silent. Too silent. I look over and see she has an uncomfortable look on her face. "What?" She looks at me and her cheeks turn pink. She looks down at the ground as we walk, biting her lip. "Prim, what? What are you not telling me?" _I swear, now is not the time to finally stop talking, Prim._

"He misses you." I frown at her. _Huh? How would she know that?_

"How do you know that?"

"He told me."

"When?"

"A few weeks ago. I saw him at school and we talked and he said he missed you."

What the heck?

"When was this, after he and I stopped talking? What else did he say? What happened? Why didn't you tell me?" The questions are coming out of my mouth before I can stop myself and Prim's eyes go wide. "Sorry, I know it's an overload of questions. But why didn't you say anything?" I hope he didn't say too much. Prim doesn't need to know about everything that's happened to Peeta and I, it could confuse her.

"He told me not to."

"He told you to lie to me?"

"_No_, he didn't tell me to lie, calm down," she says, holding up her hands in surrender in front of her. "He said that if anything came up in conversation to say it, but not to offer it up. He wanted you to figure everything out on your own. But he was sad, Katniss. So sad. I've never seen him like that, ever. He just seemed so lost and alone."

"I know, Prim. I know." My thoughts wander to him earlier today. The way his eyes were tired, his skin lacking that glow as usual. "But how long ago was that? I saw him after school today and he blew me off. He's so angry with me." My heart sinks when I remember how Peeta acted towards me earlier compared to how it was before. The look in his eyes, the way he ignored me until I pulled him around to face me; it broke my heart. I never thought interactions between Peeta and I would go like that. Ever.

"This was like a month ago. It's been awhile. I'm sorry, Katniss." She clutches my hand again and gives it a squeeze. She wraps her arms around my waist as we walk. I wrap mine around her shoulders and pull her close, resting my head on hers for a moment.

"Yeah... me too."

I look up ahead and see Madge's house. Her house is beautiful. It's not overly extravagant but at the same time it isn't exactly homely, either. I've been over a million times and her family has always gone out of their way to make me feel at home, welcoming me with open arms. I look back at Prim and back to the house. I only consider it for half of a second before making up my mind.

"Hey, Prim... I'll see you tonight at the house. Do you think you can manage getting home on your own?"

"Yeah. Are you going to go see Madge?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Good, maybe she'll be able to knock some sense into you." I give her a mean look and she shrugs her shoulders. "Bye!"

I watch her leave as I tentatively make my way up Madge's doorsteps. I stand in the doorway for a second collecting my thoughts and knock on the front door. A moment or two passes and I hear shuffling, followed by a loud thud. My eyes widen and I grimace and step back a little, waiting on the front door to open. I hear a muffled voice inside. What is going on in there?

The front door bursts open and Madge is standing there with one sock on, her hair sticking out in all directions, and a huge stain on the front of her shirt. _What the heck? _She scowls at me.

I chuckle and shake my head. "Should I bother asking?"

"I was carrying a bowl of soup to the table and tripped."

"And you're missing a sock because..."

"It was the closest thing available and I needed to clean up the mess."

"Ew! Madge, that's what towels are for!" I shudder.

"Don't hate. What's up?"

"Remember how you were always convinced that Peeta and I would be perfect for each other?"

"Why?" She narrows her eyes at me and tries to hide the smile that's breaking out across her face.

"I need your help."

* * *

><p>"What do I do? I can't play games. I'm not like that and Peeta isn't like other guys," I murmur in the comfort of Madge's bedroom, both of us laying on her huge bed staring up at the ceiling. I look at her. Meeta gives me a sympathetic smile and takes my hand in hers, giving it a squeeze and releasing it. She looks back up at the ceiling.<p>

"No, he's not, Katniss. He's special. That's not going to work in this situation, anyways."

Madge now knows all of my innermost secrets. As gossipy as she is, I know she has my best interests at heart. She's more experienced than I am and I know that if she knows it's a serious matter, she won't go around talking to other people at school. As much as she drives me crazy, she's always been there for me, like now. She listened patiently while I told her every single detail. She gasped when I told her about the showdown with Scott and sighed when I told her how Peeta and I almost kissed; all of her reactions basically mirrored mine. She knows absolutely everything now. She's handled everything perfectly so far; no squealing, no overreacting, just being here for me when I need her most.

"I just feel so hopeless right now, Madge. I don't know what to do. You didn't see his face when he walked away from me." I sigh and turn on my side facing her. I clutch a pillow to my chest and curl my knees up to my chest. "I'm really scared," I whisper. She turns over and lays on her side facing me. I close my eyes and bury my face in the pillow.

"Katniss, I still don't understand a few things. Why did you tell him you couldn't be friends? If you knew that you had feelings for him?"

I roll my eyes.

"Stupidity," I huff.

Madge rolls her eyes and nudges my leg with her knee. She waits patiently for me to answer.

"Honestly?" She pauses and nods. I think about it for a moment. "I'm still not completely sure. I wasn't sure I had feelings for him in the beginning. Maybe I did, and I just didn't understand those feelings completely. I knew I cared for him as a friend, but it wasn't until I truly let go that day in the rain that I knew I cared for him as more than a friend. Then I started having doubts and got scared. More like terrified." Madge shakes her head at me and tosses her hands in the air.

"Terrified of what? Peeta's crazy about you." She shakes my shoulders just a little. "Seriously."

"Used to be."

She grimaces and shrugs her shoulders. "Feelings like that don't disappear that fast, though. Especially not the kind of feelings like he had for you. I'm telling you Katniss, that boy has seen you as something more for years now."

"Yeah, well, maybe. But we haven't talked in over a month until today. He's had plenty of time."

She doesn't say anything; she knows it's true. She sighs in exasperation. "I think there's only one thing to do." She smiles. "You've got to lay it all out for him, Katniss. If he can understand where you were coming from, maybe he'll come around. Right now he probably thinks you're toying with his mind. He doesn't know you actually had a reason to get scared away."

"Madge, I saw him today and when he asked me what I wanted I was speechless. I couldn't think of anything to say. How am I supposed to tell him every twisted word that went through my mind and convince him to befriend me again when I can't even speak in his presence? I feel like this is going to be impossible."

"Are you willing to try? Is Peeta worth it to you?" She watches me as I ponder her words. I nod.

"He is."

"Well, there you go."

"I don't think I can just go up to him and spill out my guts though. That just seems so drastic."

"Then start by being his friend again. Easy as that."

My stomach flips flops as I realize the task ahead of me. It's not going to be easy; it'll probably be the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with, apart from my family troubles when I was younger. But I know it's worth it. I know that if this works, if I can succeed in even just getting him to become my friend again, there's a possibility that it can work. I just have to try.


	16. Chapter 16

It's raining again, which is a welcome relief from the sweltering heat from the last few days. I hop over water puddle after water puddle as I head to my destination, the bakery. My heartbeat speeds up as I think about talking to Peeta again; I'm hoping that this time I won't chicken out and just stare at him like an idiot. I'm not completely sure about what I want to say or do, but I'm hoping he'll at least give me a chance to talk to him instead of running out of the room like usual.

I look down at my feet as I walk, concentrating on missing any and all chances of water puddles I may encounter. I'm wearing my boots and a pair of shorts- no wet clothes for me today. I hope Peeta will enjoy the fact that I braved a rainstorm just for him. I pull the umbrella over my head a little closer to me and angle it as the wind blows into me. I scowl. The rain just keeps getting worse and worse. Maybe coming outside today wasn't such a good idea.

The bakery comes into my field of view and I pause for a moment, considering going back to the house and cuddling up with Prim like we usually do on rainy days. My eyes flicker back down the road and to the bakery. I groan and trudge forward, coming to the front of the bakery. I sneak a peak through the window and see Peeta leaning against the counter looking bored. His elbow is on the counter with his hand propping up his face and he's staring at the ceiling. My heart starts racing faster than ever and I muster up my courage and quickly open the door, stepping in out of the rain.

Peeta jumps and stands up straight. Too straight. Unrelaxed and unnatural. I smile at him and he returns it with a blank stare. He shifts his weight from one foot to the other but he doesn't leave the room; that's a good sign. I take in the shop for a moment. The rainy day is leaving the inside of the bakery with a grey overcast. It's moody and dreary, easily matching the outside of this place.

"Hi," I whisper, placing my umbrella down at the door as I come to stand at the counter with him. He's wearing a white shirt and a pair of jeans underneath a mint green apron littered with splotches of color and white patches of flour, or sugar? I'm not sure. His hair is it's usual mess and he's got blue stains on his forearms. Food coloring, I'm sure. I look up and he's watching me, still speechless. I hold his gaze for awhile when he finally breaks the silence.

"How can I help you today?" I look at him in surprise. Of all things for him to say to me this was one thing I wasn't expecting. My heart sinks. If he's going to treat me like any regular customer, this could be a lot harder than I thought. My eyes shift over all the pastries in the shop, focusing on a sugar cookie. I reach in my pocket and pull out my coin purse, counting my change to see if I have enough to purchase one.

If he doesn't want to talk, fine. I'll sit in here until he does.

"Just one cookie, please." His eyebrows furrow in confusion. His mouth opens like he's ready to say something and then closes again. He watches me, narrowing his eyes, and pulls out the drawer with the small paper bags in it. I shake my head. "No, for here, please. If I take it home it'll get soggy. It's raining out there pretty hard."

He stands completely still and clenches his jaw and stares at me. He watches me in suspicion for a moment, his eyes narrowing at me. "What are you doing?" He opens a different drawer and pulls out a small paper plate and a napkin. Slamming the drawer shut and opening the glass door to the case, he pulls out a pair of tongs and lifts one sugar cookie off the platter holding the rest. He places it on my plate and sits it down in front of me.

"Trying to enjoy a cookie, if you don't mind." _This isn't going right at all_. I've made him angry already and all I've done is ask for a cookie. I try to think of something else to do. I give him a small smile and slowly reach across for the plate. "Where are your brothers? Or your parents?"

"I'm the only one here. Sorry if my company isn't what you were expecting." He rolls his eyes and tenses his jaw again. He turns back to the case and places the tongs back inside and wipes his hands on his apron, sighing. I shake my head at him.

"I didn't say _that_, it was just an honest question. I was just wondering. It's nice to see you here instead of them." His eyes soften at that and search mine quizically. He seems so skeptical of me wanting to just have a conversation with him. I don't blame him, it's not his fault. After all, I did tell him I didn't want to be his friend or _anything_.

I take out the money I owe him and reach across the counter to drop it into his hand. He looks down and slowly reaches out to take it. Our finger tips touch for just a moment and it's like a bolt of electricity runs down my hand all the way down to my toes. Our eyes meet and I know he felt the same thing I did. He opens the cash register and drops the change into my hand, but I notice that this time our fingers don't touch. I try to ignore the dissapointment I feel and I stand there for a moment uncomfortably. _What do I do? Should I say something? Should I play it cool or apologize? I don't think the time is right yet._ One thing is for sure: I need to get him to talk to me again.

I take my cookie to a small table next to the window. I can feel Peeta watching me out of the corner of my eye as I pull a chair back and sit down facing in his direction. My eyes flicker up to his and when they meet, his dart away. He blushes and starts fidgeting with his apron, then puts his attention on the case. He opens the door and starts rearranging everything inside, perfectly centering every cookie and making sure the cakes are all lined and spaced evenly. I smile. Maybe he's nervous right now, too. I pick up my cookie and take a small bite, enjoying the sweetness of it. I close my eyes and savor it. When I open them again, Peeta is watching me. I take a deep breath.

"What do you do on days like this?" I motion to the window at the rain. No customers have been in or out since I arrived here. I'm guessing by the way Peeta looked bored out of his mind earlier that none had come before me in awhile either.

"Walk in traffic is typically pretty slow, so we find things to do here and there." He squats down behind the counter out of my sight for a moment. I hear a cabinet opening and when he reappears he is holding a spray bottle of some type of cleaner and a rag. He walks out from behind the counter to clean the outside glass of the case.

The lights flicker on and off and all of a sudden a huge crack of lightning explodes outside. Out of surprise I jump about three feet in the air and Peeta drops his bottle and rag. We both look at each other with a sigh of relief thinking that was the worst of it when the power flickers again and then shuts off for good. Another crack of lightning lights up the sky from our view of the window. I groan. Great. Now it's not just rain, it's lightning too. It's about a twenty minute walk home. It's going to be miserable.

"I better get back home."

Peeta's face snaps to mine. "Are you kidding me? You're not walking home in that." He picks up his cleaning supplies and puts them on the counter before walking over to the window with me to inspect the weather outside. He shakes his head. "It just keeps getting worse. The power is off and there's lightning flashing like crazy out there. You don't need to get electrocuted." I stand next to him watching the rain, listening to the loud crashing of water as it falls on the roof over our heads. Lightning flashes again and a loud crack echoes, making me jump again. I take a deep breath. I hate rain but I'm absolutely terrified of thunder; I have been ever since I was little.

"You can wait out the storm here," he says quietly.

"It may just get worse. It's better that I leave now than get stuck here all night."

"It probably will get worse, which is more reason for you to stay here. A little umbrella isn't going to protect you against lightning, Katniss." I sigh defeatedly. He's right. I don't want to get trapped out there somewhere. At least here there's a roof over my head. This is so not the way I planned this afternoon to go; I wanted to come talk to him and leave, not get stuck here for who knows how long. Then I realize something and I smile to myself.

He's still trying to protect me.

At the same time, him keeping me here is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing in that I can spend time with him, alone time, with no one around. A curse in that it's just the two of us, alone, with no one around. I tend to babble when I get nervous. If there was ever a time when I was nervous around Peeta it's now. We stand in an awkward silence for a few moments and I clear my throat. I shift from one foot to the other and Peeta reaches behind himself to untie his apron, lifting it over his head to leave it on the counter.

He locks the door entrance and motions for me to follow him. Quietly, we make our way through the darkness to the side door that leads to the staircase on the side of the house. I follow him up the stairs. My eyes linger on a new photo frame hanging in the place of the old one that shattered the last time I was here. That day it was raining too; odd coincidence maybe.

We step into his bedroom and he immediately goes into his desk drawer and pulls out a box of matches. He lights a few candles, leaving the room with a faint glow so that we aren't in complete darkness. I stand in the corner of the room awkwardly not knowing where to sit or what to do. I quietly walk to the window and stare into the dark sky outside. Another flash of lightning illuminates the sky and soon after another roll of thunder roars through the house. I flinch again and wrap my arms around myself. I can feel my breathing quicken just a little.

"Are you okay?" His voice in the quietness of the room makes me jump. I turn and he is right behind me, making me jump again. I clutch my hand to my chest and stumble backwards.

I pause for a moment. "I don't like thunder. Never have, ever since I was a little kid." I wrap my arms tighter around me, sighing. He gives me a small smile and walks backwards, sitting on his bed.

"Thunder? That's just God bowling up in the sky."

I chuckle. "That's a new one," I murmur. "Puts a new spin on things." I walk towards him and sit at the other end of his bed. I place my hands in my lap and fidget for a moment. It's quiet again. Too quiet. I know that sooner or later I'll have to say something, anything, about what happened between us. I'm not sure about how to start that conversation though. How do you tell someone you want to be thier friend again when you went out of your way to stay away from them for so long?

"We should try to think of something to pass the time instead of just sitting here," he whispers, biting his cheek. He sighs and leans back against his bed post. I remain silent. _I bet he's regretting inviting me to stay to wait out this storm. He must be feeling as awkward as I am._ A thought runs through my head and I smile to myself.

"Lets play Questions."

He's confused and his eyebrows furrow at me. He tilts his head just a little. "Questions? What's that?"

"We go back and forth asking each other questions. Anything goes. If you don't want to answer, you pass. The first person to pass three times loses." My heart starts beating rapidly, like it's about to beat out of my chest. I know this game could go bad for me, but I'm hoping it could help me.

Peeta doesn't speak for awhile. He studies me carefully for a few moments and I begin to wonder if I've made a mistake. Maybe it's too soon for this, after all. I swallow and look down at the bed, picking at a loose thread. He's watching me intently; I can feel his eyes burning into me. The candles give off a soft glow, emitting a warm light across his face. My eyes flicker back up to his and he runs a hand through his blonde hair. He sighs and rubs his hands together, breaking the silence.

"Do you go first or do I?"

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><p><strong>Don't worry, the wait won't be long for the next chapter... it should be up in about a day or two. And it'll be extra long, just because of all of the love I have been getting! Thank you all SO much for the encouraging reviews; I can never express how thankful I am! Every time I get an email sending me a notification of reviews and private messaging I do a little happy dance in anticipation of reading it! haha I love you all and you'll be hearing from me soon... :]<strong>


	17. Chapter 17

**Oh my goodness. I CAN'T EVEN. hghdflghfkjgh ahhhhhhh!**

**I have the absolute sweetest and most encouraging readers a girl could ask for. Thank you all so much for all of the kind words! I never thought I would get this much appreciation for my first fanfiction, and I appreciate each and every person who takes the time to send me love! Now for the new chapter... I TOLD YOU ALL IT WOULD BE SOON! I think you guys will like this one! ;]**

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><p>"I'll ask you something first," I say as I stare out of the window. <em>Something easy to begin with<em>. Nothing too hard. I'm hoping he'll ease in to the harder questions instead of breaking straight into grilling me for answers. I groan inwardly. _What have I gotten myself into?_ My eyes skim over a new drawing hanging on his wall. "What's your favorite color?" Such a simple question, but one I never found out in our time together before now.

"Orange." What? I wrinkle my nose. Random. "Not like a bright neon orange, though. Softer. Like a sunset." I close my eyes and smile and nod. I can see that- so Peeta. "Is it my turn to ask you something now?" I open my eyes and I feel a knot in the pit of my stomach. _It's now or never_.

"Yeah," I whisper.

He contemplates for a few moments. He opens his mouth and closes it, then sighs. He looks down at his hands which are fidgeting in his lap, exhaling loudly. He looks up. "Why are you scared of thunder?" I breathe in a huge sigh of relief. So maybe we can work up to the hard stuff. Good. I look out the window as yet another flash of lightning fills the evening sky. It's getting darker and darker outside.

"I've hated thunder ever since I was a little girl, but the reason I'm terrified of it now is-" I stop. I've never told this to anyone. I feel so stupid when I think about it, what I've associated it with, but I can't help it. It just is. I look at him and he gives me a small nod, encouraging me to continue. "The day before my dad died in the explosion, we had one of the worst thunderstorms I've ever seen in District Twelve. It thundered and flashed lightning non stop for hours, and the next day he was gone. Ever since then I think something really bad is going to happen, like it's a bad omen or something. I know, it's stupid."

He gives me a sympathetic smile and looks out the window from his spot on the bed. He scratches the back of his neck and looks back at me. "It's not stupid. I'd probably think the same thing if I were you." He pauses. "Besides, they can be pretty terrifying." I nod and change the subject.

"What's your least favorite thing to bake?"

"Macaroons. Hands down. Those things taste delicious, but they're so temperamental and hard to make. If it's too humid, or too hot, or raining, they don't rise and harden properly. If you put in the wrong measurement of one ingredient it can mess up the whole batch. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing like making a batch of them that come out perfectly, but it takes forever to get down the art of making them. It took me forever and I still mess up occasionally."

"I'm terrible at baking," I say with a laugh. "I tried to bake Prim a birthday cake once and it came out to a huge lumpy gooey mess. So you shouldn't be too hard on yourself." He nods, giving me a hesitant smile. He thinks for a second.

"What's your favorite place to be?"

_With you_. I shake my head and roll my eyes, chuckling to myself. _I can't say that_. I look up and Peeta is looking at me weird. I roll my eyes and shake my head again. "Nothing," I smile. "Let's see... My favorite place to be? There's this spot in the woods that my dad used to take me to, a pond way out in the middle of nowhere. It's where I go when I want to be alone and just think. It's beautiful out there."

Peeta already knows I go into the woods to hunt, so I know he won't freak at my answer. He nods at me again. He's still quiet as ever. I bite my lip and study him. The candles are just barely illuminating his face giving him an ethereal glow. He looks beautiful. A manly beautiful, if that's possible. I try to think of a question that will make him more relaxed, but nothing comes to mind. _Think Katniss, think..._

"Have you ever gone commando?"

Peeta raises his eyebrows and bursts out laughing. "Are you kidding me?" He smacks his knee with his hand and rolls his eyes, chuckling. He stares down at the floor. I wait patiently for an answer but he doesn't say anything.

"I mean, you can always pass if you don't want to answer." I raise an eyebrow at him and wink. He starts laughing again and blushes. _No way. Has he gone commando?_ I feel my cheeks blush. Wow, Peeta. _Racy_. "It's alright, Peeta. I'm not judging." He starts laughing again and has to catch his breath. He shakes his head profusely and holds his hands up in front of him.

"No, Katniss, I have never gone commando," he laughs. "Personally I think it's a little gross. My brother does it all the time and it's the most awkward thing ever to know that he's standing right next to you butt naked under those gym shorts of his." He wrinkles his nose. "_Ugh_."

"I was getting worried there for a second," I say laughing. I pull out my braid and begin shaking it through with my fingers. I run my hand through it and begin braiding it again. I brush a stray lock of hair behind my ear. He watches me, smiling.

"Have _you_ ever gone commando?"

"As in, just underwear or counting... like... my bra?" I blush. I'm surprised Peeta asked me this question, but I did ask first. Big shocker. I opened the flood gates, I guess.

"Both." His cheeks turn a deep shade of scarlett as he waits for my answer.

"Uh, well," I say as I think of the right way to say it, "in public, no. But I go to sleep without a bra. But not topless, I still wear a shirt and stuff." I bite my lip. I just said that out loud. I just said that to Peeta. He knows I sleep without a bra on now. Well... Now he'll have something to think about at night, I guess.

"What do you wash first when you take a bath?" His eyes widen. Yes, I just went there. You want to know if I get naked under my clothes? I want to know what you wash first when you're naked and in water. It's on, buddy.

"Um. I usually wash my chest and arms first and work my way down," he says. _Damn._ More information than I thought I'd get. "Do you take long or short baths?"

"Long ones," I say. "I like to enjoy my alone time." His cheeks turn pink at that. The tension in the room builds little by little as I think of my next question. I decide to stray away from the bathroom and nakedness.

"What's your most embarassing moment?"

He's quiet and his face falls. He's silent for a long time. Too long. "When you saw my mom hit me." Neither of us say anything for a few minutes. I sigh as my heart breaks; I didn't mean for it to go down that road. I didn't mean it. I'm sorry, Peeta. This was supposed to be a fun game, not a sad one.

"You shouldn't be embarassed about that. It wasn't your fault."

"Yeah, but still," he murmurs softly. He changes the subject. "Do you sing in the bath?"

I smile. Back to the bath questions again? _My, my, Peeta, you have a one track mind._ "Surprisingly, no, but I used to sing to Prim when I gave her baths when she was little." I pause and think for a moment. "I don't really sing that often. I'll hum here and there though."

"You have a beautiful voice." I look at him in surprise and he blushes again. _When has he heard me sing? _"When we were little, you sang the valley song for our class. I've never forgotten it; it was great. You should sing more often."

A shy smile breaks across my face. I sigh. "Mmm, not sure about that, but okay." I lay on my back on the bed staring at the ceiling and Peeta does the same. "Okay, next question. Where is your family? I figured that they'd be home by now." Another roar of thunder explodes outside. I shudder again and Peeta looks at me, worried.

"You sure you're okay?"

"I'll be fine."

"My family, they're out of town," he murmurs. "They went to a different district to get a new oven for the bakery. I got stuck with the housekeeping duties." He raises his eyebrows at me and rolls his eyes. "How fun. I've never had a more boring weekend, I swear." I don't say anything as I wait for his next question.

He hesitates for a moment too long, "How many boyfriends have you had?"

_The real questions begin_. I take a deep breath as my breath quickens and my heartbeat picks up. "None." He turns and looks at me in surprise, raising his eyebrows at me again. His expression is incredulous, like he doesn't believe me. "Seriously. Never had one." He looks back at the ceiling and is quiet for awhile.

"Why?"

"It's my turn to ask a question."

He rolls his eyes and huffs. "Convenient."

"How many girlfriends have _you_ had?"

He laughs. "Copycat, much?" He's quiet and pulls his hands behind his head, using them as a makeshift pillow. "I've never had one either. I've had a crush on someone since forever, but I don't think she's ever really noticed me." His eyes flicker to me and look away, nervous. My heart drops to the pit of my stomach. _Is he trying to say what I think he's trying to say? _What do I say to that? He speaks again. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why haven't you had a boyfriend yet?"

I sigh. "Honestly?" It's now or never.

"Unless you want to pass."

I seriously contemplate it and then change my mind. Here we go. "Honestly, I never met anyone that I saw as more than a friend or classmate before. I'm perfectly content being alone," I murmur and look over to see Peeta's face flash in sadness for a split second. "Or at least, I thought I was. When I finally found someone I messed everything up." My heart is racing and I stare at one little spot on the ceiling, not moving, not breathing. I can feel Peeta's eyes watch me for a moment before his head turns back towards the ceiling. "I didn't really see it until it was too late."

Peeta is silent. Too silent. My eyes flicker to him and he has an unreadable expression on his face. He turns over on his side facing me, propping his chin up with the palm of his hand. "My turn to answer a question." I sigh in disapointment. I guess I won't get a reaction from him, then. If that's the case, I'll ask him something hard too.

"What do you really think about me?"

His furrowed crease together and his cheeks turn pink. "What do you mean?"

"If someone asked you about me, as in what I'm like or what you think about me, what would you tell them?"

He pauses for a long time. He opens his mouth and closes it again, stopping himself. He searches for an answer and watches me for a second, staring into my eyes. His eyes soften and he pulls a hand through his disheveled blonde hair. He sighs. "Pass."

Surprise flows through me. "_What? _That's such an easy question!"

"Not necessarily."

I groan loudly. _Damn you, Peeta_. I roll my eyes and wait for my question.

"Who was the person you messed everything up with?"

My body goes slack. I bite my lip. _I should have seen that coming_. I freeze and stop breathing. I feel the blood rush to my cheeks as I swallow my surprise. He's staring at me with an unfaltering gaze, refusing to look away from me. His blue eyes look much darker than usual. I look away from him, not meeting his eyes. "Pass." I sigh. _I'm not ready for that yet, I don't think._

He huffs again, rolling his eyes. "Go figure."

I narrow my eyes. "So, anyways, next question..."

"No. I really want to know who it was." He continues staring at me.

"Yeah, and I passed."

"You can't always pass in real life, Katniss."

"Peeta, please don't." I pull a pillow to me and cover my face with it, burying my face in it.

"Is that why you freaked and stopped talking to me?"

"What?" I whip the pillow away from my face. "What in the world are you talking about?"

"Katniss, I'm not stupid. Just tell me who it is."

"Peeta, don't push it. I don't want to talk about it."

"Let me guess. You were hanging out with me, and we were getting really close. I know I wasn't imagining that. I know it wasn't just me feeling those things, Katniss."

"Peeta-"

He cuts me off. "Please. I need to say this. I've been holding it in for over a month now and we're sitting here acting like nothing happened and I can't do that. _I can't. _I'm sorry." He watches me and I say nothing, so he continues. "We spent so much time together and to go from seeing you every day, to having all those moments together, to all of a sudden having it all ripped away for no reason? What happened? Was there someone else you were seeing and you walked away from me because it was messing things up with them? And now you're coming back trying to be friends with me again like I'm the rebound? Come on, Katniss. What's going on? What do you want from me?"

"Wait. _What?_" I sit up and face Peeta. "Is that what you think? That I had someone better on the sidelines? That I got rejected and you were my second choice?"

He sits up next to me. "I don't know." He's staring at the ground, refusing to look at me. "You said you messed things up with someone and you refuse to say who. I don't know what's going in your head. You're so hard to understand sometimes." He sighs. "I mean, did I scare you off that day in the rain? When all that stuff happened with Scott and my mom? I know what happened with Scott was bad, but that's over now. And I know my mom is a bit scary, but you seemed fine when I walked you home that night. All of a sudden it's a ghost town and then the next time I see you, you say you can't be my friend anymore. What did I do? Was I not good enough or something? Was there someone else?"

It's time to lay it all out. I can't bear to see him hurting like this. He's watching me intently, pain and hurt all over his face. He sighs and looks down, defeated. Beaten. Alone. All because of me. My breath catches in my throat. My hands are shaking uncontrollably as I reach out to take one of his hands. He looks down at my hand on his, stunned.

"Peeta, there is _no one _better than you." Peeta's head snaps up as his eyebrows furrow in confusion. The rain outside is now at a mere drizzle, and the room is silent. "There's not. I came here today in the middle of a storm to come talk to you because I have been so beat up about what happened between us. I've been miserable ever since the two of us stopped talking. When you came into my life, everything changed. And when I walked out of yours, I thought I was doing something that was best for both of us."

He shakes his head, not understanding. "What?"

"I was _scared_, Peeta. Terrified. I've seen what heartbreak does to a person first hand. Look at my mom- she lost my dad and basically went crazy for a few years. I didn't want that to happen to me. I never thought I would miss you as much as I did. I didn't realize until the day I left class crying that I needed you in my life. I couldn't function without you."

"Why didn't you say something?"

"I didn't know what to do. I thought it was too late."

He's not saying a single word. He's just staring at me, his eyebrows raised. "And you think it's not too late now?"

My heart sinks. "I don't know. Is it?"

"I'm not sure. This is a lot to take in. You really hurt me, Katniss."

"I know. I'm sorry. I can't tell you how sorry I really am."

He's quiet for awhile as he thinks about everything I've just told him. "I don't know what you want me to tell you right now." He lets go of my hand and stands up, walking to the window. He faces me again and sighs, putting his hands in his pockets. "I'm not sure I can handle going through all of that again."

My heart drops to my feet.

No, no no.

It's not supposed to go like this.

He doesn't say anything for a long time. Too long. Excruciatingly, I wait, hoping that this doesn't mean what I think it means. _It's too late, Katniss. You should have known._

"I can't do that again, Katniss. I'm sorry."

"I understand," I whisper. I take in a deep breath and tears threaten to spill over. _This all my fault._ I've done this to myself.

"The thing is..." My eyes lift up to meet his. "I'm not strong enough to stay away from you." My head snaps toward him and I suck in a breath of air, my eyes widening. Is he saying what I think he's saying? "I miss you."

My heart is soaring and flying and I can't breathe. I'm speechless as he continues.

"I'm not sure what that means exactly, but I'm willing to try. But we need to take things slow." He gives me a small smile. "Next time you want to freak out, talk to me first. Don't be such a pansy."

I laugh, a tear of happiness trickling down my cheek.

"Come here." He opens his arms and I stand up, walking into them. I bury my face into his neck and he wraps his arms around me, one hand on the nape of my neck and the other around my waist. I feel myself instantly relax in his arms, more relaxed than I've been in a long time. I smile and clutch him to me even tighter. We hold our embrace for a long time, neither of us wanting to let go.

Finally we both pull away and Peeta looks outside. "It's getting late. I better get you home."

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><p>That night I sleep soundly for the first time in a long time. When I wake up the next morning, I smile and stretch out my legs. Buttercup sits at the foot of my bed, hissing at me. I ignore him and let out an almost silent squeal, giddy with happiness.<p>

It's a brand new day.

_Peeta is giving me another chance. _


	18. Chapter 18

**Sorry it took me so long to update, my loves! Like I said before, once my mom gets to town my updates won't be as frequent as before. My mom got here last week so it's been really crazy with the wedding planning, but that doesn't mean you all weren't on my mind. I don't want you all going crazy! I'll try to update again in the next few days, so until then, here's a new chapter to tide you over. :]**

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><p>English class is so boring.<p>

Mrs. Neppencourt is droning on and on and I just can't seem to focus today. My eyes flick to Peeta at the front of the class. He puffs out a breath of air and runs his fingers through his hair, leaning over his desk. His pencil moves quickly across his notebook- drawing as usual. I jump when Madge quickly tosses a folded up piece of paper on my desk. I smile and quietly open it, making sure not to crinkle the page and make too much noise. We've been passing notes back and forth all class. She's back to her nosy self again.

_So what's going on with you and Peeta? Did you guys solve anything? _

_Maybe._

_Maybe? That's it? TELL ME SOMETHING WOMAN! _

_Calm your horses! We talked. _

_Okayyyy... and what did the two of you talk about? _

_Stuff. _

_KATNISS! _

_Don't hate. _

_Katniss, tell me something! I'm dying over here! _

_We got stuck together in the dark last weekend during the thunderstorm and hashed everything out. He told me he misses me. _

_Y__AY! I told you it'd be fine... How has everything been since then? _

_I don't know. Wierd. _

_Wierd how? _

_Wierd like we're friends again, but... Not the same as before I guess. I don't know. _

_Well... try harder._

It's been a week and so far the only difference between me and Peeta's relationship is that we're talking again. He's started walking us home like he used to and he doesn't ignore me at school like he used to. Don't get me wrong, I'm more than happy to have him in my life again and I'm not taking that for granted, but the closeness we had before hasn't been there. So far there haven't been any tender moments like when we danced in the rain or the deep conversations we had walking home from school. Peeta said we had to move slow before, but now I'm beginning to wonder if he means our friendship or if he wants something more like I do. I don't want to push anything, though. I messed up once; I don't want to do it again.

It's funny when I think about how the dynamic between the two of us has changed. When we first started getting to know each other, it was all Peeta. I know that and see that now. He was always the one initiating conversations, he was the one who insisted on walking me and Prim home every day, he was the one who tried. I barely tolerated him at first, and as soon as I saw what I felt for him I went running. Now I'm the one initiating conversations; I'm the one working for it. I know it's not Peeta trying to play games; it's only Peeta trying to protect himself from me. I've hurt him once, now I have to prove to him that I won't do it again.

I tuck the note into my backpack and look out the window. The day is beautiful outside. The wind is softly billowing though the trees and it's sunny. It's not too hot; the rain has cooled the temperatures down a bit. It's the perfect day to go on a hike to the pond. My mom is picking Prim up from school today because she has after school tutoring, so I can leave right after school ends. The bell rings and everyone grabs thier bags to leave the endless hallways of our school. Peeta meets me at the back exit to walk me home.

"Hey!"

"Hey." He opens the door for me as we both exit together. I adjust my packpack and close my eyes, breathing in the fresh air and letting the sunshine soak into my skin. I live for these days. I live for these simple moments.

"So... Today I'm not going home just yet. What are you doing today? Want to go on an adventure?" I wink at him and nudge his elbow with mine.

"What do you have in mind?"

"It involves walking on the wild side."

His eyes widen. "Outside of the fence?"

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><p>"Peeta, your foot steps are so loud!"<p>

"I can't help it! I'm not used to hiking through the woods. Go easy on me."

"Then stop being loud!"

"I'm trying!"

I chuckle to myself. Ever since we snuck underneath the fence an hour ago, he's been crunching and snapping his way through every branch and twig possible, it seems like. Every time one snaps, his body freezes and he looks around like someone else did it. Then he realizes it was him and he makes a face, moving on to the next twig. Silly boy. So far it seems like he's been enjoying himself though. I'm glad; I wonder when he last got the chance to just relax and do whatever he wanted. He needs to have fun more often.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't have too much longer to go," I say, stepping over a large branch. "Trust me, this is going to be worth it."

"It already is. I wish I had my sketchbook with me. Or my paint. It's so beautiful out here," he murmurs.

"Maybe one day I'll bring you back so you can paint it."

He gives me a warm smile. "I'd like that."

We walk in silence for a few more minutes when I see the spot that leads to the opening to the secluded pond. I push back a few branches hanging low that cover a small path. I glance behind me and he locks eyes with me. My heart starts beating quickly. I'm nervous as I push back the remaining branches that open up to the pond.

It's breathtaking as usual. A clearing breaks way to the pond which is sparkling blue and green and reflects the afternoon sky off of its surface. It's silent here. The water is still and the birds chirp quietly. A slight breeze dances around us and the clearing is speckled with flowers all around the pond. I look to Peeta and he is completely transfixed. His eyes are filled with awe as he takes in the scenery around us. He sighs to himself and smiles, closing his eyes and breathing it all in.

"Wow."

"I know."

"I never thought I would see a place like this. It's absolutely beautiful, more than I could have ever imagined."

"I know."

He smiles at me and I lead the two of us to my spot underneath a tree. It has a long smooth trunk that sticks out of the ground like a backrest; I sit and lean back against it, facing the pond. Peeta takes a seat next to me and doesn't say anything. His arm touches mine, but just barely. I sigh and lean my head back, closing my eyes.

"Thanks for coming with me today."

"Thanks for inviting me."

I smile, my eyes still closed. "I wanted to share this with you. It's a special place for me, my favorite place to be. It's the perfect day to enjoy it."

"It really is the perfect day. Were you planning on this or was it spur of the moment?"

"Definately spur of the moment. It usually is though, honestly. I get restless or I just miss coming here so I just drop everything and come.

"Well, I'm sure everyone else you brought loved it just as much as I do."

My eyes open and I look at him. "I've never brought anyone here with me before."

His face snaps to mine. "Not Prim? Your mom?"

"Not exactly lovers of the wilderness."

"No other friends?"

"Nope. Never found someone I wanted to share it with."

He's silent for a while. He places his hand over mine, gives it a squeeze, and places his hands in his lap again. Instantly, I miss the warmth from his hands as it disapears from mine. His eyes meet mine. "Thank you for sharing this with me."

I don't say anything, just give him a smile. I lean my head back against the tree trunk again, enjoying the silence and peace around us. I feel Peeta move and feel pressure on my legs. I look down and his head is laying on my lap, his body stretched before him. He looks up at me. "Is this okay?" Madge's words return to me from earlier. _Well... Try a little harder._ He's obviously trying, too. It's my turn.

I nod and slowly, tentatively, reach to run my fingers through his hair. He watches me apprehensively and our eyes are locked on each other. I continue playing with his hair, brushing some off his forehead, smoothing out the disheveled pieces. He sighs, shifts a little, and his eyes close. This is the first time he's allowed physical closeness, not counting our occasional hugs. This is private, intimate. Close. I savor the moment. As his eyes are shut, I memorize each line, each freckle on his face. His thick eyelashes kiss his cheeks lightly, and he has a light splattering of freckles across the bridge of his nose. A stray freckle rests above one eyebrow, and I allow my fingertips to softly run across it. I absentmindedly run my fingers up and down his cheek and return it to his hair again. He smiles.

We sit like this for a long time, neither of us saying anything, just me alternating between playing with his hair and running my fingertips up and down his cheek. When his breathing becomes deeper I look down at him again. He's sleeping. I chuckle and stop running my fingers through his hair, not wanting to wake him. Instead, his hand reaches up, clasping mine in his.

"You didn't have to stop doing that."

"I didn't want to wake you."

"Mmm, quite the opposite. It made me fall asleep in the first place."

"Well, sleepyhead, you need to wake up. We can't fall asleep out here."

His eyes narrow. "Who are you calling sleepyhead?" He reaches up and pokes my tummy.

I lightly smack his head and he chuckles. "I'm not the one who clonked out in your lap, sir. Just saying." I smile at him and he sighs, sitting up. He's quiet for awhile as he gazes out at the pond, not saying a single word.

He breaks the silence.

"I wish we could stay here forever."

His eyes focus on mine, captivating me. I wish he could know what he does to me, all with one simple look. My heart races, my cheeks flush, my stomach swirls. If only he knew. Not breaking eye contact, he reaches forward to take my braid in his fingers. He looks down at it and slowly, he pulls out the band holding it together. He gently combs it out with his fingers, letting it all fall loosely around my shoulders. The breeze softly blows through it and I shiver a little.

"Are you cold?"

I shake my head. "We need to get back headed home. We can always come out here again one day."

He nods. "Sounds good. I love it out here. Thank you, really. It's gorgeous."

"There's no one I'd rather share it with, Peeta."

He steps forward and brushes a lock of hair behind my ear. His fingertips linger against my earlobe and I shiver again.

"There's no one I'd rather share this with either, Katniss."


	19. Chapter 19

"What are you doing tomorrow?"

He thinks about it for a moment as we walk back towards town. "Nothing that I can think of right now. It's Saturday so there's no school. Why?"

I'm fidgety, nervous. "I thought we could do something," I say. My stomach swirls and I smile down at the ground as we walk.

"Like what?"

I pause and blush. "I don't know. I didn't think it through all the way." He shyly smiles at me and rolls his eyes. "Whatever you want to do; maybe you can draw me." My breathing quickens as the words tumble out of my mouth. Where did that come from? _Draw me, really? _Way to sound creepy.

He watches me, contemplating. "Hmmm..."

"I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to. I just thought-"

"I'd love to, actually. We can do it at my house, if that's alright. I have all my stuff there." He seems excited. I exhale, glad my idea was a good one. No one has ever drawn me before, except for Prim, and I'm not sure I'd count her. Peeta has been doing this for years; it's his passion. This is going to be great. _Right? _I smile at him, reassuring myself that it's Peeta. It will be perfect.

* * *

><p>The next day I'm getting dressed in my bedroom and nothing seems right. The clothes I'm wearing are too boyish, or my braid doesn't want to cooperate with me. I sigh loudly in frustration. The reflection is see in the mirror isn't me- I'm calm and collected, not frazzled and unkempt. I groan and pull my shirt off, digging in my drawers for something else to wear. <em>It's not this hard to pick out an outfit, Katniss. Peeta isn't going to care what you wear. He's drawing you, not taking you out on a date. <em>

Wait, _is_ this a date?

Oh, crap.

I didn't think this through enough. Stupid Katniss, stupid Katniss. I slam my drawer shut and sit on my bed, shaking out a top and pulling it on over my head. My mom walks into the room and stands in the doorway smiling at me.

"Is something wrong, sweetheart? When are you heading over to Peeta's?"

"Soon. I don't know what to wear. Nothing seems right. I hate being a girl, it's too much work." I let my body go slack and I lay on the bed staring up at the ceiling. "My hair is being stupid and none of my clothes seem appropriate. He's only drawing me; I don't know why I feel nervous."

"Because you like him. Do you want me to help you? I do have more experience with boys, you know."

I roll my eyes. "Yeah, I know. I'll take any help I can get." She squeals and walks out of the room. I roll my eyes and laugh. When she returns she holds her hands behind her back.

"Do you trust me?" My eyes narrow at her, suspicious. She giggles. Why is she giggling? "The trick is, you want to look like you, just a bit more... presentable."

"Are you saying I'm not presentable?" She rolls her eyes.

"No honey, I did not."

"Then why do I feel like I should be terrified right now?"

She beams at me and reveals what is in her hands. I gasp.

"Mom. No!"

* * *

><p>I stand outside of Peeta's house as nervous as ever. I adjust my outfit and knock on the door waiting to hear the sound of his footsteps barreling down the staircase. The door bursts open and Peeta seems out of breath. He opens his mouth to say something and stops, staring at me. His eyes widen and he breathes in, taking in my appearance. I smile.<p>

My mom let me borrow a dress of hers from when she was younger and still a Merchant girl. I've seen it before when I was younger but never imagined that one day I would get the chance to wear it. It's a beautiful pale orange cotton sundress- Peeta's favorite color- and wraps around my body to show off my curves without showing too much. She let my hair down and curled it, giving it a natural soft wavy look. She also curled my eyelashes and darkened them, and dabbed a touch of color on my lips. I still look like me, just more presentable.

I feel radiant as the sun.

He swallows and smiles. "You look beautiful." He opens the door for me and steps to the side to let me in. He seems nervous as he motions for me to go up the stairs to his room. He clears his throat as he follows me up the stairs and goes to open his bedroom door for me. I stand awkwardly in the center of the room, fingering the bottom of my dress. His desk is covered in pencils and little black sticks and erasers. I see small white things that look like rolled up paper.

"Where do you want me to sit? I've never done this before."

He motions to the bed. "You can sit on the edge of it, looking towards the window. The lighting is really nice today." I walk to the edge of it and sit down, finding a sweet spot that seems comfortable enough. I adjust my dress and smooth it out and look at Peeta.

"Is this alright?"

He sits in his chair and studies me for a moment. He stands up and stops in front of me and gently touches his fingers to my chin, tilting it up just a touch. He brushes a lock of hair behind ear, his fingers trailing down the length of it, lingering for a second too long. He blushes and walks back to his chair.

"Look out the window and try to stay as still as possible. If you move even a little bit it could change the whole portrait." He clears his throat again. "Let me know if you need a break." He props a drawing pad across his lap. He picks up a pencil and begins sketching. The sound of it scratching against paper fills the room. Both of us sit in silence. I can feel his eyes on me as I gaze out of the window. I relax and enjoy the feel of the sun lighting up my cheeks and radiating into my pores. The silence is comfortable between the two of us.

I sit in silence for a long time, an incredibly long time, when I begin to get restless. I begin to shift every few minutes and twitch. My bottom is beginning to ache and I know that I need to stretch.

"Peeta?"

He snaps his head up to me. I still haven't moved, but I need to. "I'm really sorry, but I need a break. I'm getting sore. Is that okay?" He nods and sits up, stretching his arms out. I lay backwards on his bed, stretching my legs and arms simultaneously. I sigh, not moving. "How long has it been so far?"

"About an hour and a half. You're doing really well so far. It's coming along nicely."

I hear a loud clanging noise from downstairs and the both of us jump. My eyes widen as I see Peeta pale and look nervous all of a sudden. I know who it is without him saying a single word and I give him a small smile to make him feel better. He returns the gesture and looks nervously toward the door as if he is in anticipation. Moments later I can hear loud footsteps booming on the stairwell outside. His eyes widen again and he looks at me. His breathing is uneven and heavy.

"Do you trust me?"

"More than anyone."

"Get in the closet."

"What?"

"She's been a lot worse than usual lately and I don't want anything to happen to you."

My eyes widen in alarm and I shake my head. "Peeta..." His eyes plead with me, begging, and they flick toward the door again. The footsteps are coming closer.

"Please, Katniss. Trust me."

Without a second thought I dart into the closet and shut myself inside. The slits in the wood allow me a small view of the room but not much. The bedroom door bursts open and Peeta positions himself in front of the closet blocking the persons access to it. I hear his breathing quicken and he steps backwards slightly closer to the closet door. I close my eyes and listen to my heartbeat which is hammering in my ears. I try to quiet my breathing by taking in shallow short breaths.

"Why are you hiding up here?" I was right. It _is_ her. His mother. Her voice has a strange edge to it, different than the last time I saw her. It sounds too quiet. Too calm. My stomach feels sick; this isn't good.

"I'm not, I'm just working on a new drawing."

I hear a snatch of paper and then silence. It goes on and on, never ending, and it's haunting. I'm terrified for Peeta. "_Her_ again?" Her voice is cold and calculating. It's seething with anger. "I thought I told you to stay away from her." She pronounces each word slowly and quietly. Peeta shifts uncomfortably from one foot to the other and doesn't say anything.

"_Answer me_!" I hear the loud noise of skin contacting with skin and Peeta goes slamming against the closet door. I almost cry out but I cover my mouth with my hand. My body begins to shake and I squeeze my eyes shut as tears threaten to spill over onto my cheeks. Peeta straightens up and stands again, facing her. His head shifts a little towards the closet door and he shakes his head slightly, only enough for me to know that it was directed towards me.

"Look at me." I hear silence and then a small sigh from Peeta's direction. "I said, look at me."

"I am looking at you," he answers in a quiet but calm voice. It's silent again in the room, but for too long. I can feel the tension mounting, building as my heartbeat feels like it's going to explode right out of my chest. Another second goes by and the silence is broken again. I hear another thud and Peeta goes sprawling onto the bedroom floor. He coughs, hard, and clutches his stomach.

My heart breaks. What is she doing to him? How could she do something like this to her own child? How can he expect me not to do anything? I hear her voice over the roaring in my ears and my blood begins to boil.

"Don't talk back to me." I shift in the closet and try to get a good view of her. She's hovering over him with a cold look in her eyes. She smiles. _Smiles_.

She is evil.

_Pure evil_.

My eyes narrow as she lifts her shirt up to expose her waistband and unbuckles her belt. Peeta still hasn't moved from his spot on the floor, curled in the fetal position, his eyes focused on the closet door. He shakes his head again telling me not to move. They shut as she delivers a heavy kick to his stomach and he begins to cough again, gasping for air, still unresponsive to her and not moving from his spot on the floor.

By now tears are flowing down my cheeks. I hold back the sobs and grasp onto the walls as if they support my weight. _Get up, Peeta. Do something. Fight back_. But he is broken, a mere shell of himself in the moment, and all the while still trying to protect me above everything else.

My eyes flick to his mother again and I see her withdraw the belt from the loops on her pants. She braces herself above him, holding the end with the notches in the leather, letting the end with the buckle roam free. She lifts her hand up to bring it down on Peeta's back.

"_No!_"

Everything moves in slow motion as I explode from the closet, positioning myself between Peeta and her belt. It makes a loud crack as it bursts over my forearm leaving a large red welt. The buckle scratches my skin in one spot and leaves a small red line of blood. I ignore the pain, bracing my body and breathing in deep. I rip the belt from her grasp and throw it across the room where it bounces against a wall clattering to the floor. She gasps and steps backwards as I throw myself over Peeta, sobbing.

"You _will not_ touch him _ever_ again," I seethe, tears streaming down my cheeks. "Do you hear me?" I run my fingers through his hair, stroking his cheek, doing whatever I can to soothe him. I turn back towards her. She steps towards me, hand raised, when I stand up again to meet her face to face.

"Try it. _I dare you_. My mother works for the hospital and knows exactly who to call to get you, a _worthless, sorry, excuse for a mother_, thrown in jail." Her face pales and she stumbles backwards into the desk. "One more time- you will not touch him again. Ever."

She nods and steps back towards the door. She clutches onto the door frame for a moment watching Peeta as tears begin streaming down her face. She opens and closes her mouth, sadness coming over her face as if she's only just realized the implications of her actions. She shakes her head and covers her mouth with her hand, gasping. She quietly walks out of the door and closes it shut behind her. I turn my focus to Peeta who is still curled up on the floor.

Silently, I lay down on the floor next to him, mirroring his body with mine. I curl my knees up and rest my forehead against his. I carefully take both of his hands in mine, entwining our fingers together, clutching them to my chest. I close my eyes and lay with him. I absentmindedly stroke my thumbs against his and bring one hand up so I can kiss it gently across his knuckles. I draw my head up and leave a soft kiss on his forehead, weaving my fingers through his hair.

I open my eyes to find him staring into mine with a strange look on his face. Wonder? Awe? I'm not sure, but it's different than any other look he's ever given me. He gives me a small smile and I jump a little when all of a sudden he pulls me close, wrapping his arms around me in a tight embrace. He buries his head into the crook of my neck and I pull him even closer to me, nuzzling him, giving him the affection he needs.

He kisses my cheek and pauses. He pulls back just a little but he's still close; I can feel his warm breath on me, his lips still lightly brushing against my cheekbone. He gently runs his fingers through my hair. I know what he wants to do before he does it, and I know this isn't the right time; he's vulnerable, emotional. I won't take advantage of him.

Even if he does leave me breathless.

"Come on." He lifts head and looks at me quizzically, disappointment in his eyes. "If you think you're staying here tonight after what just happened, you have another thing coming."


	20. Chapter 20

It took a lot of convincing to get Mom to let Peeta stay over without telling her details, but finally she agreed on a few conditions. One, he sleeps on the couch. Two, no "funny business." Lastly, at any point in time in the future, she _will_ be told what happened. Not now, but one day. I let Peeta decide on the last condition- it's not my secret to tell- and he's fine with it, as long as he doesn't have to say anything right now. We set up a makeshift bed for Peeta on the couch and Mom and Prim left us alone so they can get some sleep.

Right now we're both sitting outside on the front porch steps. The cool night air encompasses us and a lone lantern gives us a quiet illumination. I can tell Peeta is exhausted; I can see it in his eyes. We're sitting facing each other. His arms are wrapped around his knees with his head resting on top. I'm sitting cross legged directly across from him.

"Thanks for today, Katniss. Really," he murmurs as he closes his eyes to lean his head back against the porch wall. "You really shouldn't have come out of there, though. If something would have happened to you, I don't know what I..." He opens his eyes and stares up at the sky. He doesn't finish his sentence. I roll my eyes and crawl over to sit next to him, scouting myself down so that we're at eye level side by side. I let my arm rest against his lightly and nudge him with my elbow.

"We got through it."

"_You_ got me through it." He nudges me back and bites his lip but doesn't say anything more.

"I wouldn't have changed a single thing about what happened this evening, Peeta. I'd do it all again." I pause. "Besides, you've done the same for me. A bit different, but the same, sort of." He lifts his head to look at me, unsure of what I'm talking about, until realization crosses his face.

"Katniss, that was never even a question in my mind. It was only right." My mind flashes back to the bread and the day in the rain. Of seeing him with the welt on his face after. He had to have known even at that age the repercussions of his actions. I wonder for a moment if it started then or if that was something he was already used to. I shake my head.

"It was the same for me." He's silent as I look to him for a reaction. "I'm only sorry I didn't help you sooner."

He sighs and reaches over to lace his fingers with mine. "Don't be sorry. It's not your fault." His thumb absentmindedly runs over mine, and he gives my hand a squeeze. I wait for him to release my hand, but he never does. "And thanks for not giving me that look. You didn't last time and you didn't this time."

"What look?"

"The 'pity me' look." He rolls his eyes. "Our neighbors would always give me that look whenever they would hear her screaming the day before or something. I think everyone in town knows how bad she is, just not the extent of it."

"Well, I do. And I meant what I said, Peeta. Never again. I can't bear to see you in pain."

"It wont happen again. And if it does, I'm leaving. Dont worry."

I lean my head back and stare at the stars up above us. We both let the silence between us linger as the sound of crickets and the breeze in the trees fill the air around us. I smile and breathe in the cool air. "It's so beautiful up there. Sometimes I think it's crazy that everything down here doesn't match what's above us."

"What do you mean?"

I pause, considering my words before I speak them. "Like... It's so peaceful up there. Serene. Perfect. And down here we have so much going on- deaths, sadness, abuse..." I trail off as I shiver.

"It's not so bad though. If everything was always perfect we wouldn't appreciate the really good things that happen every once in awhile."

I scoff and laugh. "Yeah? Like what?"

He stares at me for a moment and I see that thing again, that look he gave me as I was laying down on the floor with him in his bedroom. He smiles and shakes his head. I shiver again, and he runs his hands up and down my arms. "Are you cold?"

"No."

"Liar."

Now it's my turn to roll my eyes. "Stop doing that."

"Doing what?"

"You know what."

He grins again and stands up, brushing off his legs. He steps into the house before I have a chance to ask what he's doing and reappears with a big comfy blanket we had laid on on the couch for him earlier. He wraps it around me and takes his place again next to me on the ground.

"You're not cold?

"What?"

"Do you want to share the blanket?"

"Oh, no. I can get another," he says as I see him shiver just a tiny bit.

"Don't be silly, Peeta." I roll my eyes and throw the blanket over both of us. It's barely big enough to cover us both so we sit closer together huddled under the blanket. Our sides are pressed together from our arms down to our feet. I wrap one of his arms around me to get more comfortable and smile contentedly as I lean against his chest. He chuckles and rests his head on top of mine, sighing.

"You just don't know how long I've wanted to do this," he whispers into my hair. He pulls me closer, his arm tightening around me. I relax into him and he leans in, his lips brushing against my forehead.

I giggle quietly. "Really now? And how long has that been?"

"Since we were little." He pulls me even closer, wrapping both arms around me. He reaches up with one hand to undo my braid and combs it through with his fingens, burying his nose into my hair. He rests his head on my shoulder and kisses my cheek before resting his cheek against mine. "From the day you sang to our class, I could never get you out of my head. You're all I ever thought about. You're different, Katniss. Even since way back when."

"Different? I'm perfectly normal, thank you very much."

"Mmm. More like perfectly unique."

"Look who's talking."

"Oh, whatever. I'm just a baker boy. Spare me."

"You're an amazing artist. A fantastic baker. And you're brave. So incredibly brave."

"Not so much," he says quietly. He withdraws and tries to pull his arms away but I grip his hands and hold him close. "Katniss, I'm not. Look at my Mom. If I was brave I wouldn't let her do the things she's done to me."

Now it's me that pulls away, but I pull away to face him. "Are you kidding me?" Peeta shrugs, a hopeless look on his face. He bites his lip and refuses to make eye contact with me. "Peeta, look at me." His eyes flicker up to mine and he holds them there. "A weak person would have walked away when he found out that I was getting threatened by Scott. A weak person would have ignored the girl about to have a mental breakdown in the hallway at school, and a weak person most definitely would not have risked his own life to protect me against someone with a knife."

"Katniss-"

"A weak person would have channeled the energy from the abuse of your mother into drugs, or alcohol, or fighting. You channeled it into art, into baking, into your relationships with other people. You're the best person I know. Don't doubt yourself."

He sighs and pulls me close again, wrapping his strong arms around me. I lean back into him and he's silent again, as usual. "Thank you," he whispers.

"Peeta, can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Why did you wait so long to talk to me?"

"To talk to you?"

"That day when you walked me part of the way home. That was the first time we ever really talked. Why didn't you do it sooner?"

He starts laughing. "I don't think you realize the effect that you have on people." I give him a glare and raise my eyebrows and he laughs again. "No, I mean. Okay. Look at it from my point of view. Here's this girl you've watched since you were little kids, and she doesn't typically talk to people. She's quiet, reserved, but has a fire in her eyes, this strength that no one can seem to penetrate. You're terrifying, Katniss."

"I am not terrifying!"

"You're intimidating." He nudges me with his elbow and I huff out a breath of air, rolling my eyes. "You are. And I always told myself that one day I would talk to you, break through your walls and talk to you, and finally one day I did. And... you blew me off."

"I did not! What? When?"

"The day you dropped your pencil in the hallway."

"What? I never..." I pause. _He did_. He returned my pencil and I totally blew him off because Prim was outside. "Crap, Peeta, I'm sorry! It wasn't on purpose, Prim was outside waiting for me." I cover my face with my hands, blushing. Geez. Poor guy just got denied from the beginning. "Why did you keep trying? I never exactly made it easy for you."

"That was the charm in it, though. I knew it'd be worth it."

"I just don't get it. I mean, I do, but I don't."

"It was you." He smiles. "If it had been anyone else, yeah, I would have given up in a heartbeat. But... It was you."

"I get it." He looks at me quizzically. "I do. When I finally realized what you meant to me, I knew I'd do whatever it took to get you back." He raises an eyebrow. "You know what I mean, butthead."

"I still don't really get what happened with all of that. Did I freak you out? Did I move too fast?"

"Oh geez, no, not at all. You were perfect, that was the problem. I had done a complete turn around since I had first met you. I never wanted to date, or befriend anyone in fear I was going to lose them or get hurt. And then all of a sudden I have this guy who walks me home and protects me and dances in the rain with me, and I didn't know what to do. I got scared. Not of you, but of my feelings. I wasn't used to them. I had never met anyone I felt so at home with until I met you. I knew it was different, and that's what scared me."

"When did you change your mind?"

My mind flashes back to the conversations with Mom and to the dream I had in class. The dream is what sealed the deal, honestly. When I woke up and wanted to be back in that moment of perfection, I knew I had been denying myself. I smile.

"A dream."

"...A dream."

"Yepp."

"The one in class when you left the room crying?"

"Yepp."

"May I ask what that dream was about?"

"Nope."

"Damn."

I burst out laughing, smacking his arm. He chuckles and pulls me to his chest. "Well, Katniss, if it's any consolation I'm glad you changed your mind."

"I was scared that you did for a while."

"Nothing would change my mind. I was just frustrated for a bit is all."

"Next time you're frustrated, come talk to me instead of giving me the silent treatment."

"Right back atcha."

I pause. "Fair enough."

He holds my hand and runs his fingertips over every nook and cranny on it, memorizing the lines and marks and scars. They continue up my arm, pausing over each distinctive mark, until he twirls a strand of hair in his fingers. I smile and turn my head into his neck. He coaxes me into turning around to face him, both of us sitting cross legged directly across from each other. He pulls me forward to kiss me on the cheek again, his forehead resting against mine. He draws one hand up to cup my cheek.

"Katniss... I have to tell you something, but I don't want to freak you out."

"Then tell me. You're freaking me out now."

He pauses for a long time and he draws in a long shaky breath. I can feel his fingers trembling as they run up and down my cheek. He whispers out the words, so quiet that at first I think I imagine them.

"I'm in love with you."

"What?" I honestly think I mishear him as my eyes widen. _Did he just... I'm hearing things. There's no way. He... No way_. My heart is racing and tingling and my stomach is swirling with emotions.

"I know it's a little weird and probably too fast for you, and I'm sorry, but sometimes you can't really control these things. I've felt this way for a long time and I can't think of anything if you're not around, you're all I think about, and when we didn't talk I was absolutely miserable-"

"Peeta-"

"No, let me get this out Katniss, I need to-"

"Peeta, I love you too."

"-say this and if I _what_?"

"I feel the same way. I thought at first it was just a crush, but it's so much more Peeta. So much more. I haven't been more sure of anything in my life." He bites his lip as he studies me.

"Say it again."

I smile, beaming at him. I say it slowly. "Peeta, I love you."

He pulls me close, embracing me so hard I can't breathe.

"This moment could not be any more perfect."

My entire body freezes. _There is no way... I didn't tell anyone I thought that in my dream. No freaking way_. I look up at him and he just smiles at me, this warm, adorable smile that makes my insides melt. His blue eyes shine at me in the moonlight and his hair falls slightly onto his forehead. I chuckle and reach up to brush it off of him and let my hand drift to the nape of his neck. His eyes go still and flicker to my mouth.

He slowly leans in, his hand cupping the back of my neck as he holds my other hand in his. My heart is racing and I can't breathe, but as his mouth covers mine, I feel myself melt into him, letting out the breath that was trapped in my chest. His lips are soft, so incredibly soft. And warm. Our lips move in perfect rhythm with each other as his hand at the nape of my neck travels to my jawline, tipping my face up slightly to give him better access to my lips. I can feel him trembling as he deepens the kiss, tilting his head slightly and pulling me in closer to him.

This boy, the boy I love, is kissing me.

And it's perfect.

It's slow, a sweet and excruciatingly slow kiss filled with so much more than words can say. It's tender and filled with so much emotion that I know it's a once in a lifetime kind of kiss; one that doesn't happen often. One that I know will repeat itself over and over with Peeta in the years to come.

A fire courses through my body as I wrap my arms around his neck and gently play with the hair at his nape, combing my fingers through his hair. Both of his hands lift to gently cup my face on either side and his thumbs absentmindedly run up and down my cheeks. He brushes my hair out of the way and they slip down to my neck. I sigh into his lips as he takes my bottom one between his, tugging ever so gently.

His tongue brushes against my lip and I meet it with my own without any hesitation. I grip the back of his neck and his fingers react by gently digging into my back. A quiet moan escapes from my lips and he sighs into me. His lips trail down to my collarbone, leaving feather light kisses all the way back up to my ear. I shiver and he smiles, going back to kiss my mouth again. When we pull away, we're both breathing hard and have flushed cheeks.

"Wow," he whispers. I'm speechless as I gaze at him with awe. He leans forward and lightly grazes his lips on mine once again, just a soft kiss this time. He smiles. "Definately worth the wait." He strokes my hair as he rests his forehead against mine.

"Definately."

* * *

><p><em>The End<em>

* * *

><p><strong>I just want to give a HUGE heartfelt thanks to every single person who encouraged me and reviewed or alerted this story. I am filled with SO much love for all of you sweet people. You guys have truly inspired me to keep writing! I have another story in mind right now, so be on the lookout and put me on your author alert list! Again, thank you all SO much and you'll be hearing from me again soon!<strong>

**xoxo, Nina**


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